Fatima Blush:
Now write this: "The greatest rapture of my life was afforded me on a boat in Nassau by Fatima Blush," and sign it "James Bond, 007."
James Bond:
I just remembered. It's against Service policy to give endorsements.
Fatima Blush:
WRITE!
Nurse:
Mr. Bond, I need a urine sample. If you could fill this beaker for me?
James Bond:
From here?
[
Fatima Blush lands in James Bond's arms when she water-skis up the ramp to the bar]
Fatima Blush:
Oh, how reckless of me. I made you all wet.
James Bond:
Yes, but my martini is still dry. My name is James.
[
Last lines]
[
Small-Fawcett is thrown into the pool by James Bond]
Small-Fawcett:
I'm sorry Mr. Bond. I obviously caught you in a bad moment.
James Bond:
M sent you!
Small-Fawcett:
Only to plead for your return, Sir. M says that without you in the service, he fears for the security of the civilized world.
James Bond:
Never again.
Domino Petachi:
Never?
James Bond:
Never again.
Domino Petachi:
Never?
[
they hug and Bond winks to the audience]
M:
I send you to a health farm to get yourself in shape! Instead you DEMOLISH it! Now I've had to notify the local police, get a minister to muzzle the press, and allocate a sizable chunk of my meager budget to renovating the establishment!
James Bond:
A man DID try to kill me, sir.
M:
Oh! Caught you seducing his wife, did he?
James Bond:
No, sir, not at all. But, in fact, I did lose 4 lbs and God knows how many free radicals.
M:
[
slams the table] That is the KIND of attitude that tempts me to suspend you, 007!
M:
Too many free radicals. That's your problem.
James Bond:
"Free radicals," sir?
M:
Yes. They're toxins that destroy the body and the brain, caused by eating too much red meat and white bread and too many dry martinis!
James Bond:
Then I shall cut out the white bread, sir.
M:
Oh, you'll do more than THAT, 007. From now on you will suffer a strict regimen of diet and exercise; we shall PURGE those toxins from you!
James Bond:
Shrublands?
M:
You got it!
Fatima:
You're quite a man, Mr. James Bond, but I am a superior woman. Guess where you get the first one?
[
Fatima lowers the gun towards James' crotch]
Fatima Blush:
You're quite a man, Mr. James Bond. But I am a superior woman! Guess where you get the first shot.
[
lowers gun to his groin]
Domino Petachi:
[
after Largo forces her to break the statue] You're crazy!
Largo:
Crazy? Yeah... maybe. I'm crazy.
Fatima Blush:
Jack must do as he's told to keep his FAST CARS and his PRETTY CLOTHES. And if he wants to keep his sister alive...
Jack Petachi:
You leave Domino out of this or I'll...
[
He attacks Fatima but she quickly beats him up]
Blofeld:
I am Supreme Commander of SPECTRE, the Special Executive for Counterintelligence, Terrorism, Revenge and Extortion. Yesterday morning, the American Air Force launched 2 cruise missiles from Swadley Air Base in Great Britain. Through the ingenuity of SPECTRE, the dummy warheads they carried were replaced with *live*, *nuclear* warheads. Your weapons of destruction are now safely in our possession and will be moved to two secret targets. Please note the serial numbers of the missiles; they will confirm the truth. Your weapons of deterrence did not deter us from our objective! A terrible catastrophe now confronts you. However, it can be avoided by paying a tribute to our organization, amounting to twenty-five percent of your respective countries' annual oil purchases. We have accomplished two of the functions that the name SPECTRE embodies: terror and extortion. If our demands are not met within seven days, we shall ruthlessly apply the third: revenge!
Q:
Good to see you Mr. Bond. Things've been awfully dull 'round here. I hope we're going to see some gratuitous sex and violence in this one!
James Bond:
I certainly hope so too.
Miss Moneypenny:
Have you got a mission, James?
James Bond:
Yes. I am to eliminate all free radicals.
Miss Moneypenny:
Ooh. Do be careful.
Largo:
Do you lose as gracefully as you win?
James Bond:
I don't know, I've never lost.
Fatima Blush:
You know that making love to Fatima was the greatest pleasure of your life.
James Bond:
Well, to be perfectly honest, there was this girl in Philadelphia...
Fatima Blush:
SHUT UP!
Largo:
Are you a man who enjoys games?
James Bond:
Depends with whom I'm playing.
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