[
Chucky about Ronald's card nights]
Chuckie Miller:
Cards with the tards. Who could beat a night of cards, chips, dips and dorks?
Ronald Miller:
I'm going to a party. John Richmond's, with Cindi Mancini.
Chuckie Miller:
Cindi Mancini? Senior, captain of the cheerleaders, most beautiful girl in the history of this county?
Ronald Miller:
That's her. Well, I'm late, gotta bolt.
Chuckie Miller:
Bolt? Something stinks in suburbia.
[
Talking to Cindy outside her house]
Ronald Miller:
I need to talk to you. Every time I call you're either taking a bath, washing your hair or you're out of the country. That was a good one, by the way.
Patty:
I mean, he went from totally geek, to totally chic!
Patty:
Didn't you like, used to mow our lawn?
Ronald Miller:
Yes, and you have the nicest pair of rhododendrons in town!
Patty:
Rhodo-who's?
Cindy Mancini:
Guys, I'll see you in home ec, OK?
Barbara:
What did he say?
Patty:
I don't care! Dig on his shirt...
[
Ronald walks the cool hallway for the first time and begin to talk to the girls]
Patty:
Didn't you like, used to mow our lawn?
Ronald Miller:
Yes, and you have the nicest pair of rhododendrons in town!
Patty:
Rhodo-who's?
Cindy Mancini:
Guys, I'll meet you at home.
Barbara:
What did he say?
Patty:
I don't care! I dig his shirt...
Patty:
Like we're not supposed to know he's SPYING on us in his SPAZ-mobile.
Ronald Miller:
Nerds, jocks. My side, your side. It's all bullshit. Its hard enough just trying to be yourself.
Chuckie Miller:
You nuked my brother.
Cindy Mancini:
What?
Chuckie Miller:
You took him from "geek" status to "king" status to no status.
Cindy Mancini:
Chuckie Miller, right? He resorted to sending his messenger boy?
Chuckie Miller:
Boy? I see no boy here.
[
Cindy puts powder on his face]
Chuckie Miller:
You think you shut me up?
Cindy Mancini:
I didn't? Well, let me try again.
[
attempts to put lipstick on Chuckie]
Chuckie Miller:
[
leaves]
[
says to his friends]
Chuckie Miller:
Babe said it was good for my complexion.
Ronald Miller:
What's his name, Biff?
Cindy Mancini:
Don't give me that! His name happens to be... Brett!
Ronald Miller:
Is there a difference?
Cindy Mancini:
Guys, take a look at forehead... do you see a sign that says information?
Cindy Mancini:
Iris? Oh yeah, she's a big conquest. She's given more rides than Greyhound!
[
Patty seducing Ronald in the car]
Patty:
Are you into long distance relationships?
Ronald Miller:
No.
Patty:
Now, then why don't you reach out and touch someone?
[
puts his hands on her breasts]
[
the girls are in Cindy's car]
Barbara:
Why wouldn't we go out with Ronald. I mean he's cute and sweet...
Patty:
And good...
[
Cindy and Barbara stares at her]
Patty:
Come on, a lady never talks.
Cindy Mancini:
Well I'll have to remember that the next time I see one.
[
Ronald washes Cindy's car]
Ronald Miller:
You can do anything you want, anything you put your heart and mind into!
[
Cindy to Ronald after their fake break-up]
Cindy Mancini:
Whatever happens to your popularity, stay yourself, don't change to please others.
Ronald Miller:
Me change? Never.
[
Quint walking into the New Year's party]
Quint:
Quinton is in! Let the fun begin!
Ronald Miller:
You ignored the Donald Miller geek for seventeen years, now you want to ride the Ronnie Miller express!
[
Dinner conversation at the Millers on report card day]
Ronald Miller:
Here is the primate example. You raise a doll-chopping homicidal maniac, and what do you do every time you see him? You give him money. Great!
Chuckie Miller:
Chillin!
Rons Dad:
Shut up, Chuck!
Chuckie Miller:
I was talking to Ma!
Rons Mom:
Shut up, Chuck!
Chuckie Miller:
You nuked my brother.
Cindy Mancini:
Chucky Miller, right? I see he has resorted to sending his messenger boy.
Chuckie Miller:
[
Looks around] I see no boy here.
Cindy Mancini:
The moon looks different now, it's not as mysterious or romantic as before.
Ronald Miller:
I'm sorry I ruined it for you.
Cindy Mancini:
You didn't ruin it, you just changed it I guess.
Patty:
Cool outfit!
Barbara:
What a severe suede!
Cindy Mancini:
You guys, it's no big deal. Bobby sent it to me from Iowa. You know they have fine leathers down there.
Patty:
Oh, yeah. The best leathers come from Rome, Paris, and Des Moines!
Jock:
Look - it's a nerd herd!
Ronald Miller:
We do have a lot of great memories but be honest... wouldn't you like to be popular?
Kenneth Wurman:
And have to be in a clique... no.
Ronald Miller:
What happened to us? We were all friends in elementary.
Kenneth Wurman:
That's because we were all forced to be in the same room together. But, hey, Junior high, high school. Forget it. Jocks became Jocks. Cheerleaders became cheerleaders. We became us. I like us.
Ronald Miller:
I just think it would be more fun to party with those guys our senior year... go to the games...
Kenneth Wurman:
We go to ALL the games.
Ronald Miller:
We sit in the visiting section Kenneth... at our own school.
Rons Dad:
[
speaking to Ronald] I'm proud of you son. You worked, you earned, you saved...
Chuckie Miller:
You Ask! Hey big Dave, how about spottin' me a twenty to purchase some necessities!
Cindy Mancini:
Are you high?
Ronald Miller:
I want to rent you.
Cindy Mancini:
You want to rent me?
Ronald Miller:
Yeah. You pretend you like me and we go out for a few weeks... and that will make me popular.
Cindy Mancini:
Just going out with me is not gonna make you popular.
Ronald Miller:
Well I have a thousand dollars that says it will.
Cindy Mancini:
I think you've mowed one too many lawns!
Transfer Girl:
Didn't you take economics? You could have had me for $49.95.
Chuckie Miller:
What we have here is something I Just learned called the law of supply and demand. I shall supply you this remote control, but I'm going to demand, say, uh, two bucks.
Ronald Miller:
Wrong! That is not how the economic theory works.
Chuckie Miller:
Look, I learned it in seventh grade, not Harvard.
Ronald Miller:
Okay, let me give you the theory of relativity. Either you put on Bandstand now, or I have one less relative.
Chuckie Miller:
I'll put on Bandstand Just for you
Patty:
[
after taking off her top] I bet you've never seen two like these before.
Ronald Miller:
Well, my parents do have cable.
Cindy Mancini:
You! Even Bobby thinks we went out. Great, huh? Ha! All of you thought we were a couple. What a joke!... Ronald Miller paid me 1,000 bucks to pretend I liked him. What a deal, huh? $1,000 to go out with him for a month. This guy. Oh, God. He bought me. And he bought all of you. He was sick and tired of being a nobody. Yeah, and he said that all of you guys would worship him if we went out. And I didn't believe that. I was, like, no way! And he was right! No, leave me alone. He was right. Our little plan worked, didn't it, Ronald? The dance. That stupid dance! What a bunch of followers you guys are. I mean, at least I got... At least I got paid.
Mrs. Mancini:
First he's a geek, and then you start going out with him. Then he's a geek again. Honey, I don't know what a geek is.
Cindy Mancini:
I guess, at the present time, a geek is Ronald Miller.
Mrs. Mancini:
Who says?
Quint:
I've learned to appreciate the finer things in life. I even travel with my own wine. You never know the quality you may encounter at a soiree.
Fran:
[
smells the wine and coughs] Very classy.
Quint:
[
takes a swig out of the wine bottle] Mm-hmm. I'm into class. It's my new thing.
Kenneth Wurman:
Look, It's the African ant eater ritual!
Quint:
[
to Ronald] Oh, Return of the Living Dred.
Ronald Miller:
[
walks over with a bat] Why don't you lay off?
Quint:
Why don't you go back where you belong, hose head.
Ronald Miller:
Take your hands off Kenneth or I'll break your arm. Your pitching arm.
Quint:
Oh yeah? Don't make me laugh, lawn boy.
Ronald Miller:
Let go. NOW!
[
slams the table with the bat]
Quint:
[
Let's Kenneth go]
Ronald Miller:
You broke your arm once before, remember? You fell out of our tree house. Kenneth picked you up and we carried you 12 blocks to the hospital.
Kenneth Wurman:
Yeah, you cried all the way.
Ronald Miller:
We were all friends then, remember? And now you want to end his life because he's talking to Patty on your side of the cafeteria. Oh man, that's stupid. I know cuz that's where I wanted to be. On your side, with your crowd. But I messed up. See, I tried to buy my way in. But Kenneth, he's not trying to buy anybody. He's just trying to make friends *being* *himself*. Cools, Nerds, your side, my side, man it's all bullshit. It's just tough enough to be yourself.
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