Louis Prima:
With all the great players playing ball right now, how well do you think you would do against today's pitchers?
Ty Cobb:
Well, I figure against today's pitchers I'd only probably hit about .290
Louis Prima:
.290? Well that's amazing, because you batted over .400 a... a whole bunch of times. Now tell us all, we'd all like to know, why do you think you'd only hit .290?
Ty Cobb:
Well, I'm 72 fucking years old you ignorant son of a bitch.
Ramona:
Greatness is overrated.
Ramona:
Who are you again?
Ty Cobb:
I am the Georgia Peach. I have 4,191 base hits in 11,429 at bats, 920 stolen bases, 2,244 runs scored, and 93 batting records; and I want you to take off every stitch of your clothes.
Ramona:
I don't think so.
[
Cobb points a gun to her head]
Ramona:
That don't scare me, 'cause if you shoot me, I'll be dead. And you're not gonna screw a dead lady!
Ty Cobb:
[
cocks gun] I might like it.
[
Cobb narrates a lengthy lambasting of Babe Ruth into a tape recorder]
Al Stump:
Come on, Ty, aren't you going to give Ruth credit for anything?
Ty Cobb:
(pauses) He could run okay for a fat man.
[
to the umpire]
Ty Cobb:
How do you do, Cyclops?
Umpire:
Shut up, Cobb.
Ty Cobb:
You're missing an excellent ballgame.
[
to a teammate who just struck out]
Ty Cobb:
Who signed you?
Teammate:
Go to hell, Cobb.
Ty Cobb:
Who did that?
[
to Stumpy, about Cobb, as Willie leaves for town]
Willie:
And you sir, you should leave this disgusting, wretched, sorry son of a motherfucker - immediately. Good evening.
Ty Cobb:
The quest for glory is not a sin.
Ty Cobb:
Baseball is a red blooded sport for red blooded men. It's no pink tea, and molly-coddles had better stay out... It's a struggle for supremacy, a survival of the fittest.
Ty Cobb:
I had to fight all my life to survive. They were all against me, but I beat the bastards and left them in the ditch.
[
after Cobb stole third]
Opposing pitcher:
Shoulda stuck it in that bastard's ear when I had the chance.
Al Stump:
All right, listen, you son of a bitch. If you die before the book is finished, I'll write the story I want.
Ty Cobb:
I ain't gonna die before the story's finished.
Al Stump:
I'll write slow.
Ty Cobb:
I'll die slow.
[
pause, and then]
Ty Cobb:
Now get your clothes on, we're gonna go get some pussy.
Al Stump:
I put up with your bullshit. I give words, I interpret, I give *life* to your bullshit. And you give me nothing. *Nothing!* But grief.
Ty Cobb:
You have never been this close to greatness in your short life son. And you love it.
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