Poll: Funniest Peter Sellers Quote
Make Your Choice
Prime Minster Count Rupert Mountjoy: My idea was sound. Only an idiot could have won this war, and he did.
The Pink Panther (1963)[having stepped on and broken a priceless violin]
Clouseau: Oh well, if you've seen one Stradivarius, you've seen them all.
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)President Muffley: Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.
A Shot in the Dark (1964)Clouseau: It is possible that his intended victim was a man and that he made a mistake.
Dreyfus: A mistake? In a nudist camp?
Clouseau: Nobody's perfect.
Casino Royale (1967)Tremble/James Bond: [to Miss Goodthighs in the hotel room] Look, I think I better - freshen up a bit. Quick. I'll be back in five minutes. If I'm not, start without me.
The Party (1968)Director: You.
Director: Yes, you. Get off of my set, and out of my picture. Off, off! You're washed up, you're finished! I'll see to it that you never make another movie again!
Bakshi: Does that include television, sir?
I Love You, Alice B. Toklas! (1968)Guru: [Walking on beach] Do you know yourself?
Harold: I'm trying to know myself.
Guru: You will know yourself when you stop trying.
Harold: I'm trying to stop trying.
Undercovers Hero (1974)Schultz: What do you look forward to?
Herr Schroeder: After the war? I look forward to going back to my old job in civilian street.
Schultz: What did you do?
Herr Schroeder: I was an income tax inspector.
Schultz: Very different from the Gestapo.
Herr Schroeder: Not the way I do it!
The Return of the Pink Panther (1975)Clouseau: This is very strange. I do not ever recall receiving the fortune cookie in a Japanese Restaurant.
Sgt. Chevalier: What does yours say?
Clouseau: Beware of Japanese waitress bearing fortune cookies.
Murder by Death (1976)Sidney Wang: No pulse, no heartbeat. If condition does not change, this man is dead.
The Pink Panther Strikes Again (1976)Clouseau: Does your dog bite?
Hotel Clerk: No.
Clouseau: [bowing down to pet the dog] Nice doggie.
[dog barks and bites Clouseau in the hand]
Clouseau: I thought you said your dog did not bite!
Hotel Clerk: That is not my dog.
Revenge of the Pink Panther (1978)Clouseau: Now, this time I'M going to stand on YOUR shoulders!
Cato: What good will that do?
Clouseau: Because I'm taller than you are, you fool!
Being There (1979)[upon walking out of an elevator]
Chance the Gardener: That was a very small room.
The Fiendish Plot of Dr. Fu Manchu (1980)Fu Manchu: Nayland Smith again. That is very good news...
Servant: Why is it good news, master?
Fu Manchu: Because I'm in no condition to receive bad news. I shall fine you each 1000 yen.
Servant: But you don't pay us, master.
Fu Manchu: Then I shall start paying you in order to fine you.