A bachelor author of sleazy books moves to a family-oriented subdivision where he becomes an unofficial relationship advisor to unhappy local housewives, to the dismay of their respective husbands who suspect him of sexual misconduct.
Peggy is 21 and bored. She has just been awarded a certificate for starting work on time for 1000 days. She decides that she needs a change so she leaves a note, which is taken to be ... See full summary »
Judge Cass Timberlane marries a girl from the wrong side of the tracks, Virginia Marshland. A baby is stillborn and she turns more and more to attorney friend of of Cass', Bradd Criley. ... See full summary »
Small town Kansas girl, Lily James, is the latest model working for the Thomas Callaway Agency in New York City. Despite her small town roots, Lily is street-wise because of her tough ... See full summary »
Theo has had many boyfriends who wanted to marry her. Since her mother, Mrs. Selworth, has been married many times, Theo is unsure of commitment. Without much thought, she finally accepts ... See full summary »
During the Napoleonic era, in Spain, a young postulant falls in love with a handsome British soldier who is recovering with others of his regiment after being wounded. Before leaving, he ... See full summary »
Diane de Poitiers is in a childless marriage with count de Breze. When he is charged with treason, Diane visits king Francis I to successfully plead for her husband's life, something that start a rumor that she has offered her own services in return. Her husband reject her, leading Francis to ask her to come to the royal court to teach prince Henry how to be a gentleman. The prince and Diane fall in love and she becomes the prince's mistress, something that makes his wife Catherine de Medici her enemy. When the prince becomes the king of France, Diane is wielding considerable influence over him.Written by
I've said it before and I'll say it again - if a movie features actors solemnly turning away from each other to stare into the middle distance while spewing gibberish dialogue, it is more than likely a bona fide bowser.
It works in Shakespeare because actors are speaking poetry, and as long as you halfways understand what they are trying to say, it's powerful and moving. But when Hollywood hacks try it, with lines written by other Hollywood hacks, it comes across as self-important tripe.
On top of that, if instead of seasoned thespains you have pretty boys like Roger Moore, you're in trouble. Pile on the marquee with Inert Carbon Rods like Lana Turner and your move veers dangerously from bad to farce.
The low point comes about 45 minutes in when they've got some Hollywood Blvd teen staring into a crytal ball and making bold predictions. It looks like they didn't even bother rustling up a costume for the kid, just dragged him right off the stroll.
This is an epic. As in epically bad.
1 of 3 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful to you?
| Report this