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Hardbodies (1984)

R | | Comedy | 4 May 1984 (USA)
Three middle-aged daddies visit California to have a marvelous time at the beach. When they learn that a nice apartment and an expensive cabriolet isn't enough for them to score with the ... See full summary »

Director:

Mark Griffiths

Writers:

Steve Greene (screenplay), Eric Alter (screenplay) | 3 more credits »

Photos

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
Grant Cramer ... Scotty
Teal Roberts ... Kristi
Gary Wood ... Hunter
Michael Rapport ... Rounder
Sorrells Pickard Sorrells Pickard ... Ashby
Roberta Collins ... Lana
Cindy Silver Cindy Silver ... Kimberly
Courtney Gains ... Rag (as Courtney Gaines)
Kristi Somers ... Michelle
Crystal Shaw Martell ... Candy (as Crystal Shaw)
Darcy DeMoss ... Dede
Antony Ponzini ... Rocco (as Anthony Ponzini)
Marvin Katzoff Marvin Katzoff ... Dorky Geek
Kip Waldo Kip Waldo ... Head Geek
Michael Miller Michael Miller ... Landlord
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Storyline

Three middle-aged daddies visit California to have a marvelous time at the beach. When they learn that a nice apartment and an expensive cabriolet isn't enough for them to score with the chicks, they employ a student to help them. At first he's as disgusted of them and his job as his girlfriend, but soon they find out how to use the situation to everyone's benefit. Written by Tom Zoerner <Tom.Zoerner@informatik.uni-erlangen.de>

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis

Taglines:

If you don't know what they are, you don't know what you're missing.

Genres:

Comedy

Certificate:

R | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

View content advisory »
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Details

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Release Date:

4 May 1984 (USA) See more »

Also Known As:

Hardbodies See more »

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Box Office

Opening Weekend USA:

$2,684,599, 6 May 1984

Gross USA:

$7,121,719

Cumulative Worldwide Gross:

$7,121,719
See more on IMDbPro »

Company Credits

Show more on IMDbPro »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

Sound Mix:

Stereo

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.85 : 1
See full technical specs »
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Did You Know?

Trivia

Director Mark Griffiths said of this movie's filming: "The first day of production we shot the title sequence, in which lots of gorgeous girls relax on the beach, listen to music, cover their bodies with tanning oil and generally hang out on the beach and in the water. When we moved locations, we piled five of the girls into a Mercedes 450SL and drove around with the top down. Well, we literally stopped traffic. People waited in intersections and cars made U-turns to get a better look at the girls. And when we had the film processed, even the guys at the lab said they could make a fortune selling tickets to our dailies!". See more »

Goofs

The dog's collar can-holder is only big enough for one beer can, but seconds after the head geek takes the can out, another can magically appears in it. See more »

Quotes

Ashby: Hey, son, I'd as soon have an inch cut off my dick than get my hair cut here.
Hair Stylist: Whatever turns you on, Tex.
See more »

Connections

References H.O.T.S. (1979) See more »

Soundtracks

Pickaguena
Written and Performed by Sorrells Pickard
(Sorrells Pickard Music, ASCAP)
See more »

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User Reviews

The first great beach movie!
5 June 2002 | by BlackJack_BSee all my reviews

Back in the 60's, the Beach movie was a popular genre in the fluff-type of film that was prevalent then, but Frankie and Annette were not the ideal types that looked good in bathing suits (Linda Evans was, though). In the mid-90's, we finally had hunks and babes, but by then, drive-ins were out and these films could only be seen on VHS tape or DVD and a lot of them were awful. In the early to mid 80's we had some knockouts in the female department, but the guys were wiry and geeky. However, with Hardbodies, that all changed, because the lead (Grant Cramer)was a handsome man with charisma, and it ushered equality for both sexes.

Cramer plays Scotty, a typical L.A. drifter with no job, but probably gets by somehow. He has a steady girlfriend named Kristi (the lovely Teal Roberts) but lives in a dumpy apartment that he's way past due on rent. He also has a goofy looking friend named Rags (Courtney Gains) who hangs out with them. The story involves three middle-aged men who come to L.A. to have "philosophical discussions" with the babes of L.A., but they don't know how to approach them. They spot Scotty using his techniques (dialoguing and BBD) on various women and they soon ask him for his help. He refuses their offer of room and board at their swank beach house, but after getting evicted and sleeping under the boardwalk, he agrees to teach them his techniques.

Of course, what prevails afterwards are the typical: beach parties that last until dawn, music, the usual double-crosses, and the eventual plot resolution. Still, it's great fun. The acting is O.K., some are fine, others are gawd-awful. The music is cool (Vixen is in it). The ambiance is fun and the dialogue is fresh. Worth renting on VHS; I doubt it's on DVD, but avoid the sequel; it's a bore.


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