Commando (1985) Poster

(1985)

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10/10
This movie was touched by God!
YugoNinja10 March 2007
Did it ever happen in your life that you've seen such a beautiful movie, such a perfect piece of art, such an unbelievable example of man-made splendor, such a gorgeous masterpiece that it hurt your eyes? Well, I did. And it wasn't the Schindler's List or the Lord of the Rings. No, it was the BEST action movie ever made. The BEST interpretation of the Governator. The BEST explosions. The BEST one-liners. The BEST plot. And the BEST tag-line. This movie is like the Art of Japanese gardening. Simple and beautiful. Balanced. Proportioned. There's just the right amount of everything. And there is just about everything that should go into an action movie: car chases, explosions, drug-lords, sex, an invincible hero, sitting-duck-like enemies, humor, knife duels, fist fights, rocket launchers, blood, death, bullets, glass, pectorals, muscles, some more muscles, explosions and more explosions. You need more? It's got Arnold. Need more? It's got Arnold with a sense of humor. Still more? It's got Arnold with a sense of humor and a rocket launcher. Put these three elements together and try to guess what happens. Destruction. On a mass scale. I won't give away the plot, because it is too intricate and surprising. Basically it is Arnie on a mission to save his daughter. That's about it. But what is important is not the fact that Arnie will save his daughter, but HOW will he save his daughter. Oh, are you saying that The Matrix is the best action movie of all time? Does The Matrix have Arnold Schwarzenegger? NO. Does Commando have the Matrix? YES. JOHN MATRIX, in fact. Oh, so you are saying that Neo dodges bullets? John Matrix doesn't need to. He is bulletproof. He eats bullets for breakfast. Need more proof? I thought so... I gave this Caravaggio painted on celluloid a 10 only because IMDb doesn't go to 11. This movie is so eye-blindingly beautiful I can't find the words to properly end my commentary and render justice to this cinematic masterpiece. So I will just use the movie's tag-line: Somewhere... somehow... someone's going to pay!
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10/10
One of the best Action movies made in the 80's
ivo-cobra815 October 2015
Commando (1985) It is one of the best a American action thriller film out there made in the world. The film is Directed by Mark L. Lester, and starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and Rae Dawn Chong.Released in 1985, 'Commando' starred action icon Arnold Schwarzenegger as a retired Delta Force operative who must rescue his daughter from the mercenaries who killed his entire team. Also starring a young Alyssa Milano and Rae Dawn Chong, 'Commando' was yet another hit for Schwarzenegger. It is been 30 years and it is still consider it as the one of most best Action war flicks in the world out there.

I eat green berets for breakfast, and right now I am very hungry.

Arnold Schwarzenegger played Colonel John Matrix, a previous Delta Force operative who must rescue his daughter from the mercenaries who killed the other members of his unit. Schwarzenegger previously rose to fame with roles in the 'Conan' films and 'The Terminator.'John Matrix, ultimate soldier and one-man army. Matrix, the former leader of a special commando strike force that always got the toughest jobs done, is forced back into action when his young daughter (Alyssa Milano) is kidnapped. To find her, Matrix has to fight his way through an array of punks, killers, one of his former commandos, and a fully equipped private army. With the help of a feisty stewardess (Rae Dawn Chong) and an old friend, Matrix has only a few hours to overcome his greatest challenge: finding his daughter before she's killed.

In the beginning, there was the masterpiece known as Commando. And the God of '80s Action Excess did look upon it and see that it was good. And all did Arnold Schwarzenegger massacre hundreds of mercenaries in displays of awesome ultra-violence, and Alyssa Milano did rejoice.

After the triple play of The Terminator and both Conan films, Arnold Schwarzenegger graduated to top billing with Commando; a classic '80s action movie which delivers tons of explosions, violence and guns, in addition to containing an assortment of evil villains, cheesy one-liners, big guns, bigger guns and enough dead bodies to keep a mortician's convention busy for days. It was produced by illustrious action super-producer Joel Silver and written by distinguished action writer Steven E. de Souza, not to mention that the primary star is none other than the iconic Arnie. On any level above that of red-faced guilty pleasure, there's simply no way to defend Commando. It's a gloriously primitive and action vehicle which makes absolutely no bones about its absurdity. It never pretends to be anything other than a simple-minded exercise in vicarious violence. Its heart and soul is best by a line of dialogue – a female character, while witnessing two macho behemoths engaged in mano-a-mano fisticuffs, exclaims "These guys eat too much red meat!"

Arnold Schwarzenegger is a delicate talent to work with. If a director tries to make the personality of a character he portrays too complex, the result will be confusion or, at best, unintended hilarity. Mr. Schwarzenegger first appears in ''Commando'' in parts - one huge bicep and then another; when the camera pulls back he is seen to be carrying an ax and the trunk of a large tree down a mountainside to his house. And the early scenes in which Mr. Schwarzenegger, as Col. John Matrix, a retired commando, is at home with his daughter (Alyssa Milano) have an underlying current of humor - it is clear the child would be as comfortable cuddling up to a polar bear.

Great and very intelligent review/retrospective of one of the most badass action movie classics of all times! I love this movie to death and i will always defend it from people who make fun of movies such as this one. I would personally prefer dozens of movies like Commando and Cobra rather than 90% of action movies today. Badassssssss Action flick, it fast Entertained , it has gore of action, tons of violence,The film is violent, and somewhat bloody. You'll see lots of heavy automatic and explosive weapons, and you'll see them used well. I grew up with this film and this film introduced me in to A Schwarzenegger films and a fan today.

10/10 Grade: A Studio: 20TH Century Fox, Silver Pictures Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rae Dawn Chong, Alyssa Milano, Bill Paxton Director: Mark L. Lester Producer: Joel Silver Screenplay: Steven E. De Souza Story: Steven E. De Souza, Joseph Loeb III, Matthew Weisman Rated: R Running Time: 1 Hr. 30 Mins. Budget: $10 Million Box Office: $220,532,327
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10/10
One of my all-time favorite movies
Chromium_515 January 2005
This is by far one of the greatest movies of the century. I can't believe what an awesome movie it is. It has no morals, no lessons to teach, no political statements, no coherence, and no sense whatsoever. When Schwarzeneggar's beloved daughter is kidnapped by a psychotic dictator, he doesn't try to reason with the bad guys or take precautions like most action heroes would. He just goes bonkers and starts killing everyone in sight. The movie is packed with fantastic scenes such as Arnie crashing a car at about 80 mph, without a seatbelt, and being perfectly fine, Arnie tearing a phone booth out of a wall, Arnie punching a guy through a wall, etc. It's gloriously entertaining.

Also, despite his reputation for bad acting, he delivers all his lines with perfect comic timing ("Let off some steam, Bennett"). Bennett is also a great character, but no match for Arnold. You'd have to be completely devoid of personality to not find this at least slightly entertaining.

10/10 stars. Seriously.
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8/10
Remember Sully when I promised to kill you last? That's right Matrix you did. I lied!!
baumer21 September 1999
When I was growing up, I had two heroes on the big screen. One was Rambo and the other was Indiana Jones. They were two relentless characters that would never stop, never give up and their tenacity was stuff that kids or teens would swear by. When we were playing adventure games those were the two characters that always got chosen to play first. But the same year that Rambo II came out, a new hero was born. We all knew who Arnold was, he was the Terminator. But when Commando was released, one of my best friends said to me, " Hey Dan, I think this guy could take Rambo." After all Matrix says to Cook, " I eat green berets for breakfast and right now I'm very hungry!" I would maybe have to concur. Matrix was the toughest man alive ( until MacGyver came out ). And Commando is one of the best memories that I have as a young man growing up in the 80's. Besides it being a damn fine, fun movie, it also has two other elements that began to teach me about film. First a young Bill Paxton was in it and secondly I began to notice the name Joel Silver. He is the producer extraordinaire that is the man behind hits like Die Hard, Predator, Weird Science and more recently The Matrix. Now I look for his name in the producers chair and when he is on that poster as producer, I'll run to that movie.

Commando doesn't pretend to be something that it's not. The Rambo character was more into politics and it took itself a little more seriously than Commando did and that's fine. But this film is nothing but entertainment. It starts fast and violent and it ends hard and violent. You think Rambo kills a lot in Rambo, then count the bodies in this one. But it is so much fun because not only does Arnold have fun with it, but the script, as cheesy as it may seem is actually brilliant. Arnold's one liners are now a staple of his film persona and I think you can look at this film as the root of that persona. For example " Any carry on luggage? " the stewardess asks Arnold, " Just him," he replies pointing at the thug that is escorting him onto the plane. After he beats the hell out of Bill Duke he says, " We'll take Cooks car, he won't be needing it." And of course, to Bennett when they are about to fight mano a mano, "Come on Bennett, let's party!" Commando is littered with small moments like that you won't soon forget. It has stayed with me for 15 years and me and my friends rent it every now and again to laugh and cheer. If this a film that you haven't seen yet, then do so. If you haven't seen this film in quite a while, you should treat yourself to it. It is fun fun and more fun. And this is the first film that Arnold reprises his famous line " I'll be back!" So what's not to like about it?
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A classic guy flick with non-stop action and hilarious one-liners.
Li-120 July 2003
Rating: *** 1/2 out of ****

Every time I'm accused by friends of being too tough or too picky on action movies made for pure entertainment (i.e. the works of Jerry Bruckheimer), I point back and tell them to look no further than Mark L. Lester's Commando as the prime example of a pure macho classic and the standard by which all mindless action cinema should be judged.

In its own simplistic ways, Commando is actually the epitome of Arnold Schwarzenegger. Whenever we think of the Austrian muscle-bound star's films; gun battles, fist fights, deadpan one-liners, a total lack of plot, and a ridiculously high body count come to mind. Commando represents all this, directed with high energy flair and a great sense of fun.

Schwarzenegger stars as John Matrix, a former commando who lives in the mountains with his young daughter (Alyssa Milano). Matrix's former teammates are being knocked off one-by-one at the orders of a Latino dictator (Dan Hedaya) who wants Matrix to assassinate a popular South American leader so that he can be instilled back in power. As incentive, Matrix's daughter is kidnapped by renegade military, led by Bennett (Vernon Wells), who was once part of Matrix's team. As soon as Matrix boards his flight, he kills his escort, leaps off the plane, and begins his eleven-hour search for his daughter. Inexplicably joining his search is a flight attendant (Rae Dawn Chong) who gets mixed up in this whole mess.

Commando is one of those critically berated movies that only concerns itself with giving its target audience a good time. Running at a lightning fast ninety minutes, the film is packed to the gunnels with explosive action sequences and quotable one-liners. In fact, the lines are so fun, I have a hard time choosing my favorites. Here are a few examples: "I eat green berets for breakfast and I'm very hungry,""Remember when I said I'd kill you last? I lied," and "Let off some steam, Bennett!"

The script is mindless and idiotic, but serves its purpose by providing just enough plot and enormously entertaining one-liners to keep the momentum from ebbing. There are also plenty of noticeable continuity errors (ask yourself how a guy standing behind a railing atop a balcony could be hit with shotgun pellets without the railing taking the slightest bit of damage!), but that just adds to the movie's list of unique charms.

But you don't watch Commando for plot or technical brilliance, you watch it to see Arnold acting as a one-man army, mowing down scores of enemy thugs and soldiers. Whether it's through the movie's various shootouts, fistfights, or chases, the movie delivers thrilling action one scene after another. The climactic battle sequence, in which he single-handedly takes on at least a hundred men, will either make or break the film for you. Me, I had a blast watching Arnold inflict his brand of justice upon these nasty villains. Unless you don't like Arnold or over-the-top action films, it's unlikely you'll find Commando boring.

Schwarzenegger's charismatic and hugely likable screen presence is undeniable, and his delivery of those classic one-liners is perfect. Luckily, the movie has an equally strong villain in Vernon Wells, who delights in chewing the scenery and generally acting as insane as possible in any given situation. From his manic facial expressions to his questionable tastes in clothing, Wells makes Bennett one of the few villains that really stand out in an Arnold flick. You know the movie's going to boil down to a one-on-one fight between the two, and it's one of those fight scenes where each one takes his turn beating the crud out of the other without one ever truly having the upper hand until the very end (when, obviously, one of them's got to be dead).

For pure mindless mayhem, Commando is a perfect choice for Saturday night entertainment. I first saw the film on its network broadcast premiere, and distinctly remember that in the scene where Arnold hides in the garden house (which is the film's goriest part), the movie is edited in such a way that it appears only one man approaches the house instead of six!
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10/10
Bad Plot, senseless killing, Arnold's at his worst: I like it!
Smells_Like_Cheese15 August 2001
Arnold, what can you say? He was so awful, yet so incredibly lovable in this terrific action film. Commando is a film I have watched since I was a little girl, it was actually released the year I was born, so I feel old now. :D But this film meant a lot to me because it was mine and my dad's film, of course, he covered my eyes during some certain unnecessary sex scenes, but we always got a kick out of the great screen play. The lines and action in Commando makes it a great and fun film to watch.

It's about a man, Matrix, played by Arnold, his daughter, played by a very young Alyssa Malono, is kidnapped by terrorists, in particular a dictator who Matrix managed to keep from destroying a country. They give Matrix a chance to save his daughter, by killing the leader of the country the dictator was trying to destroy, since Matrix was so trusted by their leader, it'll make it more controversial. But Matrix has other plans and escapes the airplane, he has 17 hours to save his daughter and kidnaps a sassy flight attendant. But she ends up wanting to help Matrix once she finds out that his daughter is kidnapped, together they work to get back to the dictator's house and save his daughter.

The great thing about this film is that Arnold goes though at least 60 extras who are all shooting at him, they miss him and he kills them all. But it's just fun to watch, as unrealistic as it is. My favorite line in Commando is when Matrix is about to throw Sully over a cliff and says "Remember Sully when I said I'd kill you last?" "That's right, Matrix! You did!" "I lied!" LOL! That was such a great scene. Commando is a great action film that anyone could at least get a good kick out of.

10/10
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10/10
Absolute Perfection
partymachine2214 February 2001
"Commando" is undoubtedly Arnie's best. The movie begins with John Matrix's (schwarzenegger) daughter (alyssa milano) getting kidnapped. Basically Matrix has a little over 10 hours to save his daughter from an evil dictator, and in order to get her back, he has to take on a bunch of hoodlums, corrupt ex-Green Berets, and a small army.

The screenplay, by Steven E. deSouza, is a masterpiece. Granted, it's not brilliant along the lines of Shakespeare, but for an action movie, it's wonderful. Chock full of wit, deSouza never makes the mistake of having the movie take itself to seriously; he maintains an excellent balance of hardcore action while at the same time creating a lovely spoof of the action genre.

The acting is exactly how it should be for a movie of this genre. I'm a little bit tired of everyone saying "Arnie can't act" "he's such a bad actor" and so on. Obviously, actors such as Anthony Hopkins and Tom Hanks are better dramatic actors, but would any of us really want to see Sir Hopkins kicking the c**p out of almost one hundred people in a movie? i think not. Schwarzenegger plays Matrix wonderfully, delivering his lines with the right amount of wit and sarcasm, and delivering his punches fairly realistically.

See "Commando" if you like action movies. It won't fail to satisfy you. If, on the other hand, you are not a fan of action movies, don't expect this one to win you over.
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10/10
Best One-Liners Ever...........and I mean ever
virginlobster12 November 2003
Commando is the ultimate in cheesy one-liners. Throughout this whole movie Schwarzenegger is at his utmost best. The movie brings action at you thru the whole damn thing. Bennett is the silliest bad guy to ever grace the big screen, not only is he small in stature, but he is the least intimidating bad guy ever. Still he makes up for it, as you might guess, in his one-liners. If you want mindless action and unintentionally laughable humor, watch Commando and I GUARANTEE you will enjoy it. A 5.5 on the votes is ludicrous, 8.8. NO LESS
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8/10
Noisy, violent, stupid and lots of fun
preppy-37 March 2001
Ridiculous but fun film with Arnold Schwarzenegger as a retired special agent being pulled back into action when his daughter (well played by Alyssa Milano) is kidnapped. To get her back he has to kill someone else.

An 80s action film all the way. It's full of noisy battles, tons of gun play, loads of fistfights and a grand total of EIGHTY-ONE bloody on-screen deaths! The film works so well because it has a good, strong sense of humor and never takes itself seriously. It makes all the blood and gore seem cartoonish. The plot barrels also full speed and it's very short (88 min). Also Rae Dawn Chong (whatever happened to...?) is very good in a supporting role. My only complaint is that the final battle between Arnie and psycho Vernon Wells (badly overacting) is way too violent--even for this film. Otherwise, well worth seeing--lots of fun if you don't mind mindless, violent films (like me). Gotta love any film where Chong learns to use a rocket launcher in a few seconds by reading the directions!
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7/10
Another Great Action Movie from the 80's
claudio_carvalho9 February 2015
The retired Special Forces Colonel John Matrix (Arnold Schwarzenegger) lives a calm life with his beloved daughter Jenny (Alyssa Milano) in an isolated house in the woods of a mountain. One day, his mentor Major General Franklin Kirby (James Olson) visits him and tells that the men he had trained for his unit are being killed and he leaves two soldiers to protect Matrix. However the helicopter of General Kirby has been followed by hit men that abduct Jenny and Matrix. Soon Matrix learns that Bennett (Vernon Wells) that belonged to his unit and was presumed dead is the responsible for attack to his house. Further, Bennett was hired by Arius (Dan Hedaya), a former president of a South American country that Matrix had overthrown. Now Arius wants Matrix to assassinate the president of his country in order to assume the position again otherwise he will kill Jenny. Matrix is forced to embark in a flight to the country with one of Bennett's thug while another one, Sully (David Patrick Kelly), will confirm that Matrix is in the flight. However Matrix manages to kill the thug and leave the plane and has eleven hours to save Jenny. He convinces the flight attendant Cindy (Rae Dawn Chong) to help him to save his daughter.

"Commando" is another great action movie from the 80's, maybe the best decade in the cinema history for this genre. The screenplay has non-stop action and funny and unforgettable moments. My favorite is when John Matrix tells to Sully that he likes him and he will be the last one to die. Soon he corrects, saying "I lied". I did not recognized Alyssa Milano, from "Charmed", in her second role as Jenny. My vote is seven.

Title (Brazil): "Comando Para Matar" ("Commando to Kill")
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10/10
As close to perfect as it gets.
Raz215211214 August 2004
Warning: Spoilers
Commando is the greatest movie ever made. This movie aspires to be nothing more than a great action movie and succeeds in every way. The director and screenwriter have no delusions about making a think piece or movie that will move you to a religious experience. They simply wanted to make a movie about a man, his hot daughter and love of violence. As in all great action movies we have a man of violence who has left all of that behind him. He simply wants to live in the mountains, watch his daughter grow up, and eat ice cream. Of course, this couldn't happen. It wouldn't be Commando. Anyways, the bad guys force him out of hiding and instead of enlisting help or trying to find a peaceful solution to the problem he kills and makes jokes. John Matrix (Arnold) embarks on a mission of creative killing and funny one-liners. Enough people have already written on how this movie plays to Arnold's strengths and describe his various deeds. I think the scene that really sets this movie apart is the attention to detail. No, not the part where the porsche gets wrecked and fixed before Arnold pushes it over. Next time you watch the film, turn the TV up very loud when Arnold is fighting Cook. When Arnold picks Cook up by his testicles you can hear the crunch and the air escaping Cook's mouth. Only the greatest movie of all time would take the time to properly document that tremendous event. This movie is as close to perfect as it gets. In the 150 times i have watched Commando the only way I think it could be improved is if Matrix kills Rae Dawn Chong at the end. That would go along better with the theme of the movie.
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8/10
Probably the best action film.
chrnaess25 December 1999
Commando is in my mind the best action film out there to date, this movie was made 14 years ago and no other film can push it out of first position.

The film got everything: a great looking Arnold, extremely fine music by James Horner and great settings for the action scenes. It`s a great ride of perfection when it comes to entertaining action fans. Rae Dawn Chong and Alyssa Milano gives fine performances as well.
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5/10
Brainless fun, but the movie itself is pretty stupid
Xophianic3 February 2000
I like Arnold Schwarzenegger movies, especially Terminator, T2 and Eraser. I didn't see Comando until over a decade after it came out. I found the movie to be really really dumb. Realism did not exist in that movie. Arnold can just about take out an entire army, while they can only hit him once or twice. And this girl that Arnold didn't even know until he basically kidnapped her was anxious to help Arnold even though she was at great risk of dying.

But if your in the mood for a little brainless fun and just watching Arnold kick *** and kill people, this is the perfect movie for the occasion. It does have many witty lines, mostly from Arnold. The acting is, although not bad, nothing special. This movie really highlighted Arnold, who did fine for the part.

It only has two or three or four main bad guys and about 150 nameless bad guys, all of which are there for Arnold to take out in a cool way. So the characters are nothing big in this movie. Aside from Arnold, his daughter, his girlfriend and maybe two bad guys, all the characters are pretty boring. The storyline is just fodder for the fight scenes with Arnold.

I'd recommend you go rent this movie when you're in the mood for some action/violent fun. But if you want to watch a movie with good plot and a good story, pass this one by.
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10/10
I LOVE THIS MOVIE!!!
TheyKilledTheGiggler7 April 2002
Warning: Spoilers
OK OK OK lets face it this is one of the most cliched action movies you can find. Senseless violence, cheesey one liners, and a horrible plot. THIS IS WHY I LOVE THIS FILM. I think it is the funniest thing to see AH-NOLD stroll around with a rocket launcher, machine guns, bowie knives, grenades, and whatever else he can get his hands on, kill hundreds of people and spout out hillarious zingers. My two favorite zingers are when arnold drops that guy off the cliff and tells the girl he "let him go" and after shoving a steam pipe through some guys stomach he tells him to "let off some steam". NOW THAT IS FUNNY. Commando is the type of senseless film you can sit back with your buddies and roast while having a good time watching it

10/10 (for it's comedic affect)
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5/10
Mindless and Shallow
KillerLord20 September 2008
Warning: Spoilers
The only thing that I like about the movie is the poster. In the poster, the man Arnold Schwargenneger wears a full military suit with muscles flexing and a gun held on the shoulders. Arnie really looks good in this pose and that is where the goodness associated with Commando begins to diminish. It is among the worse movies of Arnold I have ever seen. Even from the standard of an action movie, the story line and the depth is poor. And there is hardly anything called realism in the movie. Of course, some people like movies where there is no realism and maybe they can have a fun time watching this movie over and over again. But for those who like action to be accompanied with some story that justifies or compliments the action, they are in for a disappointment.

The overall plot is trivial. Arnie is leading a retired life. Suddenly, he is forced out of retirement when his daughter gets kidnapped. And off he goes chasing after them. And in the process, he kills many people. Of course, I don't mind one man killing many people - that is what being an action hero is all about anyway but the fact that he is using a gun and dropping them down like flies is not something you can watch over and over again.

Arnie walks across a field and shoots his gun at a couple of people. While not a single bullet even reaches him, all his bullets reach the enemies and they all fall down like flies. The only better scene is a physical fist fight between the villain and Arnie. Here, we see that Arnold is indeed a human being and can take some damage. But rest of the movie is too overdone. Unbelievable and highly unrealistic action scenes coupled by a loose plot makes this movie a one-time watch and forget kind of a movie.

I might as well mention that the soundtrack is good. But overall, the movie is a bit lame especially compared to other greater movies of Arnold. Overall verdict, I would say a movie worth watching over a rented DVD or cable TV. Cheers.
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10/10
Absolutely hilarious. Arnold's pinnacle achievement.
justabloke61624 November 2006
This is probably the best movie that Arnold Schwarzenegger has made (even surpassing T2), not because it has any plot development, realistic action sequences, or anything else that you would expect, but because it is HILARIOUS. The amount of laugh-out-loud moments in Commando is on par with Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Borat, and other such films. YES, it is THAT funny.

What other action movie opens with the hero and his daughter feeding a deer and licking ice cream? What other movie has lines like "I eat green berets for breakfast. And right now I'm very hungry"? And Arnold, as John Matrix, was dodging bullets (and killing the population of a small country) long before that pussy Neo was even born.

Commando also has one of the best baddies of all time in Bennett. This man is so hard that he wears chain mail, and feeds off electric shocks. And he doesn't shoot people between the eyes, he shoots them between the balls! See this movie, you won't be disappointed.
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Remember when I promised to kill you last?
Dr_Sagan21 December 2014
It was like yesterday (well, sort of!) when I watched "Commando" at a movie theater! And that was 3 decades ago. I checked it again today because of some reason and I am amazed because of how less silly it looks to me now.

It's a classic. No doubt about that. And it's pure fun. Violent-ish of course but with great tongue-in-cheek humor delivered by one of the most charismatic actors ever.

If you have missed it before go watch it (with a pinch of salt

of course)! A fun way to pass one hour and a half!

  • Remember when I promised to kill you last?


  • I lied!
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7/10
One-liner after One-liner
MUFCOK26 September 2014
This is a good fun action movie. It has everything an Arnie, 1980's action flick should have. Weapons, explosions, lots of bad guys and of course, memorable one-liners.

The story is of course a very simple one, Arnie's daughter gets kidnapped in order to blackmail Arnie into killing the president. Arnie takes it upon himself to disobey those orders and starts a one man war to kill everyone & anyone who gets in his way. There is no character development, no emotion, no sub plot, nothing realistic but it sure is entertaining. Now Arnie is in no way shape or form, a good actor but he does his job fantastically in this film. He is not cast to show off his acting skills, he is cast because he is a man-machine with presence and successfully brings a comical aspect to his movies with perfectly timed one-line quotes.

This movie is downright ridiculous. Arnie, jumps from a movie plane during take-off and lands in a knee deep swamp – unhurt. He crashes a car at high speed into a post, without a seatbelt – unhurt. He rips a phone booth out of a wall. He avoids every gunshot, even at close range, the list goes on. Does any of this matter? No! If you are looking for a realistic film then this certainly isn't for you.

The character 'Cindy' is by far the biggest negative in this film. She isn't needed what so ever, Arnie could quite easily have managed on his own. Her attempt at one-liners also go down like a led balloon. The kid is also irritating but thankfully she doesn't get too much screen time.

Brain-dead action movies are certainly not my favourite movie genre. I can however, appreciate that this is a good one! I thoroughly enjoyed watching it but I wouldn't give it a top end rating because of this.

Start the movie, sit back, and enjoy this movie for what it is.

7/10
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Hilariously stupid
Apox6620 September 2004
Warning: Spoilers
This film is, ironically, one of Arnie's most serious films yet it is hundreds of times funnier than his "comedy" films. This is because it is so deliciously clichè. He has the corny one-liners, the run-of-the-mill plot line and the massive explosions. For pure entertainment you could do much worse I assure you!

One of the funniest parts of the film, which borrows quite severely from the James Bond series, is when he wanders around the drug lord's compound with grenades and a mini gun. Here he kills between 50 and 100 jumpy henchmen, all armed with AK-47s. Naturally they don't get a single hit on him. Genius, in a spongy sort of way :-)
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10/10
"...you'll cooperate, right?"........"WRONG!"
KillMe66612 August 2001
Arnold - the action movie king of the eighties!

This film is the greatest and most enjoyable action movie ever made, yes it may lack brains but who the hell cares? It's a movie with Schwarzenegger and has the title - "Commando", what do you people want? Mental stimuli? Thought provoking drama? Intricate plots? Pah! Arnold wipes his butt with such phrases.

Arnie plays the retired commando of the title who is forced to wear his cammo's again when his daughter is kidnapped by the stereotypical bad guys as a blackmail - he must kill the U.S. president or they will kill his little girl. Obviously Arnold isn't going to stand for this kind of nonsense so he escapes from the plane they put him on after killing the male chaperon and begins the hunt, gaining assistance from Rae Dawn Chong along the way.

Although a complete testosterone-fest from start to finish this film has a comedic side (though nearly totally engulfed by the action), which gives it a certain (good ole 80s) charm, that means if you like the film you will watch it again and again, and perhaps a third time.

It has many classic lines from the big man, for example; before the 'bads' put him on the plane, he retorts to one of them who makes sly comment about his daughter - "Your a funny guy Sully, I like you - that's why I'm gonna kill you last!".

After killing the baddie on the plane he says to a stewardess - "Don't disturb my friend, he's DEAD tired!"

My favourite is when another baddie - Cooke (although his buddy in 'Predator') is brawling with Arnie and manages to pick up a large revolver, which he points at Arnie and says - "F*** you Ass****!", he pulls the trigger but the gun is empty so Arnie retorts - "F*** YOU Ass****!" and smacks him one!

My review may be biased as I think Arnie is the man (before his decline into utterly abysmal movies that is), but still, if you want to see a one-man-army in action, then see Commando.
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7/10
Stallone never had to deal with this!
Mr Yu2 July 2002
Apparently, after a horrifying appointment with his hair stylist. Arnold attempts to quietly retire with his Supercuts settlement money , Alyssa Milano (too young) , and 4000 guns and weapons. Apparently a heavily steroid abusing Freddy Mercury wants revenge for either a lousy tip or being forced to use a lousy Aussie accent. This may lower your opinion of Freddy, but remember his absolute brilliant performance at Live Aid as a redeeming factor.

Anyways, Arnold's daughter (Alyssa) gets kidnapped by Freddy. This really ticks off Arnold. Future tip: If you are flying coach with Arnold, give up the window seat, as he hates the aisle. I MEAN HE REALLY HATES THE AISLE SEAT! You know how the beverage cart bangs you in the elbow and then the stewardess says, `Watch your elbow'? One to many times for Arnold and he snaps, if you get my meaning. Bad guy exiting gives Arnold 11 hours, pick up a date, kill a member of a '80's rock group, destroy a classic MG and keyboardist and a pair of undersized, discounted Speedos to go after his daughter. Arnold KILLS everyone! If you had a relative in California in the '80's, Arnold kills him or her in this movie. I lost count after the first 18 or 20 million. I mean he goes as far as killing one bad guy with an 8' Black & Decker fine tooth table saw blade. This blade was introduced in the late 70s's to cut laminates, wall board and minimum wage movie bad guys.

The BIG SHOWDOWN happens when Psychotic Freddy Mercury is interrupted from singing `We are the Champions' . Ginsu showdown ensues with improper a/c duct relocating applied and Freddy convinced that he should stay with Queen.. Of course I could say `Another bites the Dust' , but I wont.

The entire Hollywood Special Op's Forces show up EXACTLY 23 seconds too late. Rae Dawn Chong , Alyssa Milano , the Speedos and his Supercuts money safe AND a Porsche, to recover his daughter. At this point he deplanes, runs into `Quest for Fire's ` Rae Dawn Chong', seat aborts a really nice MG and chases down the lead singer of Wang Chung, totals MG and punishes Wang for violations against humanity.

Nick Tortelli of `Cheers' seems to be the Madman behind the scene , having taken over the very strange and exotic province of `Santo DeCheesmo' a small , yet diminutive isle first settled by poor soles affilicated by a rare , yet fatal diseases : Bad Acting. His Supercuts stock being lowered by Arnold's settlement , he has Freddy kidnap Arnold's daughter and hires the entire Columbian , Nicaraguan , Costa Rican and Peruvian Marching Bands to guard her. Nick was never smart with his money nor his taste in music.

Hilarity ensues as Arnold mortgages EVERYTHING for his rubber dingy, some weapons, bad dialogue, dry ice, his kettledrum player
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10/10
This movie is awful... I LIED
Metallica5443214 October 2003
This is a great action movie. Filled with the essentials of action: Arnold, guns, chases, fights, errors, and one liners. Arnold was great in this picture it was very entertaining dont look for a story look for action! action! action! The gun fights were great, Arnold was great. This movie is the best for all and any action fans.

Best scene: Shed scene (kills people with gardening tools)

Best line: Remember Sully when I promised to kill you last?...I LIED!

I give commando 9/10
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10/10
Bad in the best way.
Volrath3278 October 2002
Some movies suck and are a chore to watch. Other movies suck and are a blast! The latter sums up Commando quite well. Artisically, sure it's a piece of crap, but who cares? I rarely have such a good time watching a movie.

I'm not sure if Arnold though this was serious material, but I don't and so I can really enjoy it. So many moments are just liberating and exhilerating in their sheer badness. Arnold and Alyssa Milano petting a deer, the fact that John Matrix can throw off eight guys but still struggle against Bennett, an overweight loser in chain mail who fancies himself a rival for Arnold, Dan Hedaya's horrible accent, the pointless nudity during the motel fight, all of it contributes to a wonderful time.

For sheer laugh out loud fun, Commando delivers the goods. 10/10
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10/10
Alot of fun
P00H-724 January 2002
There were many senseless action films made in the 80's, mostly Stallone flicks, but one action film rose above all the others and still stands today as one great piece of 80's entertainment.

Commando unfortunately doesn't get the credit it deserves, and I think the reason for that is that the perception of the audience is somewhat blurred by the assumptions made about the film, being a dumb action flick in the vein of Rambo. This film however does something that Rambo didn't and that is, Commando refused to take itself seriously. It knowingly went way over the top, and gave discerning audiences some great fun, this film is absolutely hilarious.

To begin with, the whole premise just makes me laugh. A former US Commando's (Arnie) old team decide to use him to assisinate some higher up in South America, they determine the best way to get him to do it is to kidnap his daughter(alyssa Milano) and hold her until completion of the assisnation. Well they manage to get her and put Arnie on a plane headed for South America with explicite instructions to kill the guy, in order to get his daughter back safely. Well in any other dumb action film the hero would probably try and think of a way to get his daughter back without tipping off the Bad guys, it would all lead to a last minute convoluted plan. Not this film, Arnie's character decides without any hesitation that the best thing to do is kill everyone.

This is what makes Commando so much fun, there are no illusions or messages, mixed with great dry humour and pretty violent killings Commando is one joyride of an era gone by, oure 80's fun.
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10/10
Can you say, "Greatest movie ever!"?
yumimbi26 October 2004
Warning: Spoilers
This is by far my favorite film of all time. It has Arnold's best one-liners that are so geniusly put that no wonder he became governor. Vernon Wells plays a hilarious villain that wears chainmail and tight leather pants. I mean come on you couldn't ask for anything funnier than that.*SPOILER* And when he was electrocuted at the end fight I almost died laughing. Hedaya has the worst wannabe Cuban accent ever and Rae Dawn Chong is really annoying in the movie which the makes the movie even sweeter. But by far my favorite character is Sully. When he screams as he is falling, it is the single most entertaining moment in movie history. If you have the DVD then check out the trailer and Spanish or French (I can't remember which one it was) dubbed version and you'll hear two more different screams which is really weird. I'm not going to go into all the great lines in that movie because there are too many of them. Just see the movie and be amazed.
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