My Science Project (1985)
Cop: Hey kid. Why do you wear sunglasses at night?
Vince Latello: Because when you're cool, the sun shine on you 24 hours a day.
Sentry: Morituri te salutamos.
Latello: Yo, Sherman, what's he sayin'?
Sherman: He's going to kick our ass.
Vince Latello: I'm cool, you're cool, we're cool, thank you, good night!
Vince Latello: Hey, I hit on Sawyer once.
Michael Harlan: Oh yeah.
Vince Latello: Yeah, I tried to give her this Italian macho bod.
Michael Harlan: What did she do?
Vince Latello: Poor girl lost out. She called me a name I had to look up in the Dictionary!
Latello: You know, my old man says, "Treat broads like dirt and they love ya."
Harlan: Oh, yeah? What's your old lady say?
Latello: Ah my parents are divorced. That's how come I'm livin' out here in the sticks with my old man.
Vince Latello: I just want to be home watching cartoons!
Sherman: This plant has been extinct for sixty million years!
Vince Latello: Yeah? Well I ain't ever seen one before!
Vince Latello: [gives the finger to another driver] Sit on this, buttplug!
Michael Harlan: [at the school library counter] We need a book.
Sherman: Oh, a car book?
Vince Latello: [mockingly] A car book?
Michael Harlan: No, a book on strange things.
Sherman: Like Vince.
Vince Latello: [grabs Sherman] Hey, syonara dicknose!
Vince Latello: I don't believe this! I could be home watchin' Magnum!
Michael Harlan: Will you stop whining?
Vince Latello: WHINING? BARNEY RUBBLE JUST TRIED TO FLAME ME OUT!
Vince Latello: Son of a bitch, whaddaya call this wawa?
Sherman: I believe you'd call him a Neanderthal man.
Vince Latello: Well I don't care what country he's from! One shot to the chones an' he's down!
Bob Roberts: [after testing the gizmo with a metal detector, which goes haywire and shorts out] Now this has gotta be broken.
Ellie Sawyer: Wait Bob, why would that be broken?
Bob Roberts: Because if it isn't broken Michael, this is older than earth! All right?
Bob Roberts: You guys cut my science final! What's with you guys? Where were you?
Michael Harlan: We got kinda hung up in the auto shop...
Vince Latello: Yeah, in the ozone.
Bob Roberts: In the ozone, Blowzone! I'm tired of you four-F's! Let me tell you something, unless your project is dyno-supreme
Bob Roberts: you both get D's!
Vince Latello: [eagerly] Hey I'll take it!
Crystal: Michael, I want to be worshipped, serenaded like a goddess.
Harlan: Oh come on, bullshit.
Crystal: That is exactly what my Cosmo Romantiscope told me you'd say Michael.
[she walks away leaving him with the magazine]
Harlan: [puzzled] Ro- Romantiscope?
Vince Latello: [smiling and waving to the camera with shades on while taking his mugshot] Hi, mom!
Policewoman: Ugly little cockroach...
Vince Latello: Hey what's the matter, I got boogers? Huh?
[finger up his nose]
Policewoman: [in his face] Hey kid, why do you wear your sunglasses at night?
Vince Latello: Because when you're COOL... the sun shines on you twenty-four hours a DAY!
Policewoman: [rips off his shades] Oh, yeah?
[stiff-arms him against the wall and walks away]
Vince Latello: Chill out, Butch... and get a shave.
Vince Latello: Danger makes great sex. Catch you guys later!
Michael Harlan: Latello, wait!
Vince Latello: Hey! These are all optical delusions. Like ghosts, so it's cool!
[calling into the fog]
Vince Latello: Here comes Latello, YO!
[Neanderthal Man jumps out and attacks]
Ellie Sawyer: [while being chased by police] What are we going to do?
Vince Latello: About one to five with good behavior.
Harlan: Caps to the dynamite, dynamite to the legs, got it?
Ellie Sawyer: Caps to the dynamite, dynamite to the legs, got it.
Latello: Caps to the legs, legs to the dynamite.
Harlan: Come on!
Latello: Hey, good thing I watch TV, huh?
Vince Latello: [Digging in the police car] I'm comin', I'm comin'. But if I'm gonna wind up in another dimension like Bob-o-rino...
[whips out a shotgun and cocks it]
Vince Latello: I'm goin' in there packin'!
General: Brief me!
General's Aide: It entered our air space last night and made a mockery of our intercept fighters. And according to the pursuit pilots it suffered a malfunction and crashed in the desert.
Bob Roberts: This thing is generating power and light without heat, Michael!
Michael Harlan: How is that possible?
Bob Roberts: It's not possible! I mean not on this World, anyway.
Vince Latello: Whoa, what other World are we talking about?