D.C. Follies Poster

(1987–1989)

Episode List

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1987

15 Sep. 1987
Reagan Parachutes Into D.C. Follies
Ronald Reagan parachutes into D.C. Follies to hear Woody Allen's paranoia about becoming a father. Martin Mull has trouble getting a drink while Nixon, Ford, and Carter badger him for campaign contributions. After being hit on the head, Admiral Poindexter miraculously recalls the events of the Iran-Contra affair, and Nixon accompanies Reagan, Oliver North and Poindexter in a D.C. Follies version of the "Iranscam Rap."
 
22 Sep. 1987
Nixon's Presidential Library Is a Bookmobile
Unhappy with low ratings, Dan Rather searches for a new image for the evening news. Mikhail Gorbachev arrives at D.C. Follies in preparation for the summit. It's discovered that Nixon's presidential library is a bookmobile. Fred becomes a celebrity for a few minutes when Robin Leach drops by looking for a guest for "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous" but is pushed aside for Princess Di. Finally, Reagan creates a panic when he mistakes a radio broadcast of "War of the Worlds" for the real thing.
 
29 Sep. 1987
Sean Penn Escapes from Jail and Heads to D.C. Follies
Prison escapee Sean Penn comes to DC Follies, where Fred and the rest of gang are preparing for the upcoming annual softball match. Also, President Reagan goes to the hospital for an operation and shares a room with Michael Jackson, Geraldo Rivera hosts his latest expose and Julia Duffy stops by.
 
6 Oct. 1987
Ollie North Raises Money with 'Adopt-A-Contra' Scheme
Prince Charles comes to DC Follies, where he tries to win back his wife, Princess Diana. Ollie North has a new scam up his sleeves, while Gerald Ford has a new hair-growing remedy and Bob Uecker wants to run for President.
 
13 Oct. 1987
Tammy Faye Bakker Debuts Her Latest Song
Caught up in the presidential campaign, Fred has a nightmare about zombie politicians. Mr. Rodgers broadcasts his show from Russia and ends up in their prison. Tammy Faye Bakker debuts her latest song and Betty White makes an appearance as a stripper for Jimmy Carter's birthday.
 
20 Oct. 1987
Jesse Jackson Sings with Dolly, Barbara and Cher
John Madden gives Fred a mechanical bull for the bar. Gerald Ford tries to ride it but gets thrown off head first into the wall, where he remains for the rest of the show. Dolly Parton, Barbara Streisand, and Cher testify at the space hearings. Jesse Jackson performs an uplifting song with Dolly, Barbara, and Cher singing backup. Fred's old flame Vanity shows up and turns the distinguished men of D.C. Follies into Jello. Jimmy Carter resolves a problem with his wife by taking her on a romantic date.
 
27 Oct. 1987
George H. W. Bush Schemes to Get Ronald Reagan Out of the White House
George Bush brainstorms for ways to get Reagan out of office. He tries to hypnotize the president but it backfires and he turns himself into "RoboBush." Jim and Tammy Bakker plan a movie version of their lives starring Sean Penn and Madonna. The Bakkers also fantasize about what their life would be like in the White House. Charlie Callas stops by to share his secret on how to attract girls. Sylvester Stallone chooses D.C. Follies as a location for his next movie and proceeds to blow up the bar.
 
3 Nov. 1987
Nixon Gives Fred Financial Advice... and He Loses His Shirt
Fred inherits a large sum of money which he invests on the advice of Richard Nixon. Needless to say, he loses all his money and is in danger of losing the bar. Nixon tries various ways to raise money for Fred, one of which is writing a children's fairy tale book. The regular D.C. Follies patrons band together to help save the bar by recording a song a la " We Are The World." Amidst all the charity events, Robert Klein makes an appearance on "Nightline" as spokesman for Jim and Tammy Bakker.
 
10 Nov. 1987
Nixon Impeached from Cub Scouts
While riding in a limousine, Reagan and Gorbachev are harassed by Sam Donaldson. Back at D.C. Follies, Nixon plans a scam for his Cub Scout troupe. He is eventually caught, impeached from the organization and in his shame runs away. Mickey Gilley parks his jet outside and delivers a song written for and about the ex-presidents. George Bush fantasizes about not being a wimp and becomes George Bond. Nixon of course returns with a new scam involving man's best friend and a monkey.
 
17 Nov. 1987
Nixon Acts as Princess Di's Divorce Lawyer
John Madden gives a play-by-play of the events leading up to the summit. Sam Donaldson practices his menacing approach to journalism on the patrons at D.C. Follies. Nixon is angry about being left out of the summit talks, but quickly recovers and comes to the aid of Princess Di as her divorce lawyer which culminates in a festive royal divorce ceremony. Mort Sahl visits the bar and drives a few customers away with his political satire. Reagan and Gorbachev encounter some ups and downs at a secret location for their summit.
 
24 Nov. 1987
George H. W. Bush Falls Into a Well
Barbara Walters, Sam Donaldson, Ted Kopel and Dan Rather do a song and dance about the news media. Woody Allen reveals that he is not really Woody Allen. George Bush, in an effort to get into the spotlight, falls into a well. Fred finally rescues him, but his moment of glory is over shadowed by Sean Penn and Madonna's reported breakup. Sam Donaldson fantasizes about creating the perfect presidential candidate and turns Fred into a monster. Rich Hall visits D.C. Follies and shares his sniglets with the patrons.
 
1 Dec. 1987
Reagan Accidentally Gives Fred a Nuke for Christmas
Santa Claus is confirmed to be real and he makes an appearance at D.C. Follies to hear everyone's Christmas wishes. Reagan attends a meeting of the defense department to learn about a new "A" bomb the size of an audio cassette, and then mistakenly gives Fred the cassette as a Christmas present. Gerald Ford then tries to disarm the bomb. The three ex-presidents play three ex-wise men and the D.C. Follies gang does a little caroling to the tune of "Christmas Day."
 
8 Dec. 1987
Reagan Tries to Wipe Out National Debt with TV Home Shopping Show
It's New Years Eve and everyone is making their resolutions. Fred feels he is becoming a doormat for his customers and resolves to change. Reagan takes to the airwaves on a home shopping show in an attempt to wipe out the national debt. Kissinger, Lee Iacocca and John Madden convince Fred that he has to get an angle so Fred sheds his Mr. Nice Guy image and in turn becomes a media hero. He snaps out of it in time to bail out Sean Penn. Ed Asner stops by for a drink and Reagan mistakes him for Gorbachev.
 
15 Dec. 1987
For Nixon's Birthday, an Opera Based on His Life
Its Richard Nixon's birthday and the gang at D.C. Follies give him a roast. Bob Hope, Rodney Dangerfield and all the regulars join in the festivities which include an opera based on Nixon's life. The cab driver, Paul Rodriguez, crashes the party and gets a chance to roast Nixon in lieu of payment.
 
22 Dec. 1987
Astrologer Joyce Jillson Predicts the Future
Famous astrologer, Joyce Jillson, sets up shop at D.C. Follies to predict the future. She predicts Jane Fonda will be a very successful bag lady; Gary Hart will again drop out of the race; Reagan will boycott the Olympics; and Nixon will be the next President.
 
29 Dec. 1987
Nixon Dreams of Being a Movie Star with Heather Thomas
Lee Iacocca moves his Chrysler plant to outer space to avoid union problems on Earth. Barbara Streisand directs a movie at D.C. Follies starring Whoopi Goldberg. Nixon dreams of being a movie star. He is a detective and Heather Thomas is his client. Gerald Ford begins his law practice with an ironic commercial about personal injury. Sid and Marty Krofft open a newsstand outside the bar.
 

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