Mini's First Time (2006) Poster

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9/10
Great dark comedy
lafs14 June 2006
If you're a fan of this genre, you'll love this film. If not probably not for you, but one of the funniest films I've seen in a long time. Depraved, unrelenting, will probably scare the hell out of some parents or Christian fundamentalists who think Hollywood is glorifying deviant behavior in our teens.

The conceit of the film, a girl who will try anything once is very effective because you're always wondering where this philosophy will take us next. Without giving anything away, this idea mixed with an ethereal, driving score pulls you into Mini's world and you'll follow her anywhere.

The performances by all 5 leads are incredible. Baldwin gives his best performance in years and that's saying a lot because he's been doing great work. It's easily the best I've seen this year so far in any film by a male lead. He renders this macho, yet beaten down PR exec in a way where although he doesn't deserve our sympathy, he gets it.

Reed is astonishing. Part vixen, part little girl lost, the glee with which she sets about her goals, takes a character who is, in fact a sociopath and makes you respect and like her. Although what she does is without a doubt destructive there is an implicit understanding that she is surrounded by adults who only pretend to be moral. Her intellectual honesty is actually refreshing.

Her performance works in part because of Carrie Anne Moss' willingness to deliver one of the most chilling and hilarious performances in years as Mini's mother. The incarnation of Hollywood self absorption. It's clear that Mini wasn't born this way, she is a product of Diane's utter lack of mothering. Mini is an inconvenient appendage in Diane's life and Diane lets her know it whenever she can.

Jeff Goldblum is spot on perfect as their TV producer neighbor, whose lighthearted, Dionysian life is a constant thorn in Baldwin's side. Luke Wilson also gives as subtle a performance as he has in years. At first playing an incarnation of his sad sack Mitch from "Old School" and then switching on a dime to show us just how smart this detective has been all along. The look of muted terror on Baldwin's face when he realizes how he's been the recipient of Wilson's own PR play is priceless.

I'm sure some parents groups will attack it as encouraging teenagers to turn on their parents and to indulge in the darkest parts of society, but it really felt like a cautionary tale about what happens when kids know in their bones that they aren't loved.
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9/10
Wickedly Funny Dark Comedy with great performances
BrianTS6 May 2006
Saw this at Tribeca Film Festival and was laughing the whole way through. This is a very unique film in that it dares to blend genres. Part pitch black comedy, part noir, it sucks you into the story and takes you along for the ride.

Nikki Reed's great in a role that could have been obvious. Alec Baldwin (always good) gives one of the best performance he has in years and Carrie Anne Moss is hilarious as the mom. Goldblum's role as the TV Producer neighbor is so damn funny and Luke Wilson gives a really subtle performance as the detective.

The twists and turns are a a blast. Definitely not a film for those who don't like black comedy, but those with more sick, twisted senses of humor should love it.
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9/10
What an amazing ordeal...
Bosco-HK10 December 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I enjoyed this movie, and actually watched the Commentary version too. Martin (Alec Baldwin) played such amazing roles, wealthy man, a stepfather, a 'fallen-for' and Mini's 'actual father'. And I was really amazed at Mini's character (Nikki Reed), I really felt that I was watching her previous movie, Thirteen. She takes the commanding role without anyone else noticing her underlying plans. She also has one of the comedic horror roles like some killer in "I Know What You Did Last Summer" or "Scary Movie". I was also amazed at her performance at grieving for a dead member of the family. I loved it! Mini's mother, Diane (Carrie-Anne Moss), was so entertaining. Though in her lines, there is a lot of foul language for her role as a drunken mother, she was extraordinary intriguing to watch her feelings shift from ultimate command of the family to frustration and jealousy to frightened. All other cast members, especially Mike Rudell (Jeff Goldblum) as the next door neighbor, and of course, Garson (Luke Wilson), who asked terrific questions that sometimes throw off people's planned responses. I enjoyed one of the questions about the car's consumption for an occurrence to happen.

The relationship built between the different characters in the movie was fantastic and enjoyable that I felt like I was literally a father if I was to choose a character in the movie. Mini's internal side at one scene was displayed dramatically awesome when her stepfather really got under her denial exterior of the real world.

I recommend this movie for teenagers and parents who would like to actually understand more of their daughters and other teenage girls in the real world who really experiences parental, social or life problems. This movie really teaches me how relationships drift and how one can make a wrong step. Also, how hard it is to play a role as a stepfather.
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6/10
disturbing, twisted, not one of my favorites but amazing cast.
triple824 December 2006
Warning: Spoilers
SPOILERS:

I thought I was going to love this! I've recently seen the movie "Pretty Persuasion" which is a bit similar to this and liked that a lot. But this movie, while not awful, really bothered me. It was very well acted, actually amazingly so, featuring superb performances from all the cast and wonderful direction but the movie was so incredibly mean that it was very difficult to enjoy it.

Since I generally enjoy these type of pictures (I count 'Heathers", "Cruel Intentions", "Wild Things", "Election" and "pretty Persuasion" as good movies) I did ask myself why I had such a hard time with this one. Using comparisons to 'Pretty Persuasion" a movie I just saw recently, I have to say that movie, despite the twisted aspects-(and there were many) was provocative. It was daring but it had something to say. There were a lot of different themes explored and it made one think.

But with Minnie's first time, it seems mean without all the Depth and introspective aspects. This is a very hard movie to like. I Will admit I was riveted and had no desire to turn it off. But man did it annoy me at times! It is a disturbing movie I'll give it that.

Some of the main characters frustrated the heck out of me. Unlike other movies, we are not provided much detail on Minnie's motivations either. She just seems to hurt people randomly. Alec Baldwin did a great job with his character but this story was just to twisted for me. I mean sometimes there is a line between dark and utterly twisted. Minnie's first time seemed a compilation of many other films but the depth needed to really make a good film didn't seem to be there. This was not awful or dreadful but it just was not my type of movie. I thought it would be. It started promisingly. But This movie just left a bad taste in my mouth in general. I guessed fairly early the pictures were from Minnie not the neighbor. I was also bothered that Minnie got of Scot free. So this isn't my favorite of the genre although I've seen a lot of 1 and 2 votes on here and I could never give it a really really low rating because it's got some positives, mainly the performances. This movie defines "Performance Driven".

So in spite of the negatives and Even though I wouldn't strongly recommend this, I'd give it a rating of low 6. It's got some positives, number one as mentioned the performances but also is the way the movie sticks with you-way more then other similar films. This movie is disturbing and one won"t forget it easily. I have noticed many either seem to love this or hate this. There are so many excessively low or high ratings on here. I'm one in between. I don't think this is Oscar material but nor do I think it's awful. I may even watch it again! (It could fall into the "Guilty Pleasure" type of movie but it wasn't that enjoyable to watch so I guess not) If I sound a bit confused about this movie it is because I am. But this is one where even though I was bothered by it, it does have something that grabs the viewer. Alec Baldwin is excellent as is Reed, Glodblum, Moss and Luke Wilson in a small but surprisingly effective role. This movie will never be one of my favorites and I can think of many other directions I'd have preferred it to go but it sure is intense movie watching. My vote's 6.
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8/10
Well made under-stated piece of cinema
InfiniteInertia31 August 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Inevitably each of us audience members will take something different away from watching this film; for me it was just how far some people will go to get what they want in this modern world, with a complete lack of moral obligation! **Minor spoiler on next 3-4 lines; skip if you want** Don't get me wrong, I felt as though it was a little OTT (considering a late teen/early 20-something could team up and commit murder/voluntary manslaughter{not sure what the correct charge would be} with step-dad), but then again I'm sure stranger things have happened in real life! The twist was obvious to me, considering the character in question; but probably not to all, but it did try to tell a moralistic tale without all the heavy lecturing narratives or sudden change of heart.

The acting was all first rate, Carrie-Anne-Moss was stunning both to look at and to watch at work as the hopeless self-indulgent mother, Baldwin was brilliant and expertly brought a refreshing duality to the step-father character: seemingly both apprehensive in some scenes & prepared to do what it took in others, which I would imagine is not an easy thing to do when reading the text on a page when getting into character. The young star Nicki Reed was great for a newbie, I have seen "13" in the rental store but I never felt like actually picking it up, but after seeing her performance in this I may decide to check it out; one to watch following in the footsteps of Christina Ricci etc playing the young but totally savvy & remarkably inventive Mini. Goldblum plays himself; almost aping himself at times & Luke Wilson follows with another underrated performance ala Royal Tennenbaums & steals the show as the doggedly determined cop who does a performance in his best "Columbo" mode.

As I stated earlier; each will see this from a different perspective, many religious people may see it as glorifying the "get rich quick by doing whatever you have to" mentality of modern people (both young and old), but remember that story is told by a character who had no real father at all (Baldwin only started acting like one during the film by the lead characters own admission 20 minutes or so into it) & a mother who takes every opportunity to dig at her with snide remarks and even use her daughters bed for her own carnal needs, without a second thought. Coming from a similar upbringing myself I can relate to certain parts of the character that mean you have to grow up fast to protect yourself from outside influences & if not kept carefully in check by the personal moral values of the self; it is easy to adopt a "mercenary" attitude, caring about nobody & nothing but your own selfish needs.

This is how I would imagine the director meant the work to be seen; a lesson in how ignoring your children's emotional and personal needs as they grow up can create damaged and sociopathic personalities, not straightforward 2-dimensional "Michael Myers" types, but perfectly adapted clever ones who pick up on the pretend niceties and morals of the adults around them & develop the facility to use all means at their disposal to manipulate and prey upon such things...Unique...
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8/10
black widow in the making
wrlang6 November 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Mini's First Time is about a rich screwed up teenage girl (Mini) whose mother had her to get money from the father. When that father died the mother landed another rich guy. When Mini accidentally gets hooked up with her step father while doing the call girl thing, it gets kind of wild. It's a little funny in the beginning as Mini and her step father do the nasty under her mother's nose. Things get a little carried away as Mini and dad finish mom's suicide and of course dad takes the fall for it. Mini gets off Scott free and has a good time doing it. Great acting all the way around, an A+ movie. Mini is a black widow in the making.
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7/10
Very Interesting
srique16 April 2007
Everyone is saying that this movie is dark...what could be darker than The Quiet!!! This movie is not as dark as some other movies that I have seen. What happens is not exactly right but it is not that DARK! The movie itself is very well done. Again, this is the second movie I have seen where the mother is so out of it that she does not really need a role in the movie. It is ridiculous in the sense that I am sure she just has a few lines. Alec Baldwin acts well as a man being controlled by his sexual appetite. It is a very funny movie. Nikki Reed is a good actress but needs to do something different. She has always done these roles of screwed up teenager. She won't be a teen for long and if she is not careful, her career will be over once she starts looking more mature. The twist in the movie is very interesting. i would say a must see at home with a few friends. Not academy award winning but very entertaining.
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7/10
A Wild and Wicked Adventure
georgianastar2 August 2006
I saw this film at Tribeca and loved it. From the moment it started with the pulsating music and the fast paced driving sequence of Nikki Reed in her sports car, I was hooked. The energy and excitement kept me on the edge of my seat and the performances were outstanding, especially the wonderfully wicked Nikki Reed, who was superb in "Thirteen."

I was especially impressed with Carrie Ann Moss' performance in a very different role, reinforcing her 'A' list status and demonstrating her wide range as an actress. Other outstanding performances were turned in by Jeff Goldblum, Alec Baldwin and Luke Wilson.

The dialogue was fresh and funny, and I enjoyed going on the wild ride with Nikki Reed and Alec Baldwin as their antics became more and more outrageous. If you love a great dark comedy, this film is for you.
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10/10
Awesome!
fivebyfive-58 September 2006
One of the better movies I have seen this year! Dark but incredibly funny at the same time, Mini's First Time really wowed me. It's a shame that this is a small independent movie and will probably not be released in many cinemas - as far as I know, there's not even a release date for the UK right now (although it's been out in the US for a while).

Nikki Reed absolutely steals the show in this. Her portrayal of Mini is funny, sexy, deliciously evil, and just very enjoyable. Carrie Anne Moss also did a brilliant job as Mini's mom, a true bitch but for who you can't help but feel a little bit sorry for as well.

I loved the combination of a dark story line with all the humour, and laughed out loud several times, something I don't do very often while watching movies! It's been compared to Heathers, another favourite movie of mine, and I can see some elements of it are similar. The style of the movie is very different though, much more polished and, in a strange way, more realistic.

If you happen to see this one anywhere, do not miss it - it really really rocks. Can't wait to own it on DVD!
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Thank Heaven for Little Girls
Snoopymichele13 December 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Contains spoilers.......................

Nikki Reed, who was so great in "Thirteen" as the femme fatale corrupting Evan Rachel Wood, is even better as the totally twisted Mini who takes delight in doing anything to get what she wants. In this case, it's her dear old stepdad Martin (played to the hilt by the always amazing Alec Baldwin). Mommy Dearest (Carrie-Ann Moss in a terrific turn)is a drunk named Diane who only had Mini to squeeze eighteen years of child support out of a producer, who died a year after Mini's birth.

The dynamic duo of Martin and Mini want Diane out of the picture, so they hatch a plan to drive her crazy so Martin can ship her off to the nut house and shack up with Mini. When their half-baked plan goes awry when Diane overdoses on pills, they decide to finish her off by making it look like she committed suicide by carbon monoxide poisoning with her Jag running in the garage. What's a little murder between lovers?

After Diane's death, the cat and mouse games begin-with Martin as the mouse and an unknown blackmailer as the cat. Martin's world begins to unravel as he tries to keep up the appearance of being just Mini's father. The pace is fast and furious, and you can't wait to see what Mini has up her sleeve next. She's not a bad girl, just misunderstood-and she makes Dede from "The Opposite of Sex" look like a girl scout.

Jeff Goldblum gives an awesome performance as a sleazy TV producer who had Diane at one time, and now has his sights set on bagging Mini. He's a lecher, but a likable one at that. Owen Wilson is perfect as a hard-nosed detective who is trying to prove that Diane's death was not a suicide, and Mini has him wrapped around her finger-or so she hopes.

It's a dark comedy about a girl gone wild, and it's worth the ride. My vote is 9 out of 10.
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10/10
Dark comedy at its finest
mheinsoo-215 July 2006
I really dug this film. Then again, I've been told I have a sick sense of humor. Mini's First Time is great dark comedy in the same ballpark as Bad Santa. So if you loved Billy Bob Thornton in that, you'll love Nicky Reed in this. And Alec Baldwin continues to impress me. His role in this ranks up there with the work he's done in films like Glengarry Glen Ross and The Cooler. The rest of the stellar cast smoked their roles as well. Luke Wilson is awesome. Jeff Goldblum is Jeff Goldblum (if you're a fan, you'll know what I mean). Carrie-Ann Moss was great. I highly recommend this one if you're tired of the "typical" summer release. See it while it's still in theaters because Nicky Reed must be enjoyed on the big screen (if you know what I mean). That girl is going places.
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5/10
Heathers Meets Gaslight.
AlanTES1 May 2006
I just saw this film's world premiere at the Tribeca Film Festival.

The movie starts off with Mini, played by Nikki Reed as a spoiled and manipulating child of a wealthy actress (Carrie Anne Moss). (ala Heathers). Anyway, Mini decides to work as a call girl for the heck of it, and one of her first clients is her step-father (Alec Baldwin). They begin a torrid love affair and devise a plan to drive Moss crazy so that they can be together (ala Gaslight). Predictably, the plan turns to murder. And "then" the movie gets really dark.

The first half of the film was really good as the various scenarios devised to make Moss go crazy are inspired and original. However, in the second half of the movie, the plot begins to fall apart and things just get too creepy. Also, the "twist" at the end is somewhat obvious throughout the film.

Finally, I still cant figure out why Jeff Goldblum is in this movie. He's a really good actor, but his character was superfluous and pointless. It seems the only reason he's even in this movie was to add some improv scenes and have him make strange faces for pointless comedy. Has Jeff Goldblum turned into the comedic version of Christopher Walken?
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10/10
Unforgettable!!
metaldave-18 November 2006
Nikki Reed & Alec Baldwin along with Jeff Goldblum are an unforgettable mix. This movie was an awesome breath of fresh air for movie watching. I have never heard of Nikki Reed before this, but I do have to say, I will never forget her.It was great to see Alec Bladwin & Jeff Goldblum together in an excellent story. I would actually like a sequel to this one(with the same characters of course)You could start the story right from where it left off. Luke Wilsons performance was too short tho. They could have made him A lot more funny. A great supporting cast. I was surprised at how many familiar faces I saw. The backdrops in this movie were very good. Kinda makes you wanna be rich! I will be buying this very soon. Buy this movie, you won't regret it!!
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9/10
This film rocked!!!!
atuse6 May 2006
Went to see at Tribeca Film fest along with a few other films and this was by far the best. Funny, twisted, weird, grabs you by the throat and doesn't let go. One of the best black comedies I've seen in years. Gotta like the darker side to enjoy it, but the ending is one of the funniest/sickest ones you'll ever see.

Nikki Reed is turning into an awesome young actress. Baldwin found something in this role that is hard to explain. You shouldn't feel sorry for his character, but you do. Goldblum and Moss steal every scene they're in. I had no idea Moss could be so funny. Made me forget Trinity, if that's possible. Luke Wilson has the courage to underplay a role that could have been really cheesy and ends up driving the second half of the movie as the calm, methodical detective.

Don't know when exactly it's coming out. They said late summer/fall. I think it might be one of those sleepers that catches on.
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1/10
Bad mad movie
feeneyorama13 October 2008
I can't believe how awful this movie was. It is the kind of movie that makes you feel guilty for watching it because it is so, so sleazy. Okay, Mini had a dysfunctional mother, but that's no excuse for her despicable behaviour. She seems to have no sense of right and wrong and no conscience whatsoever. All the characters in this movie are so thoroughly unlikeable that you really don't care what happens to them, you only hope it happens soon. For the life of me, I can't understand why Mr. Baldwin would stoop so low as to appear in something as bad as this film. Surely he doesn't need money as badly as all that. The constant voice-over from the talent-challenged actress who played Mini is a constant annoyance. I think you are supposed to feel sorry for the step father character, but I sure didn't. My advice to anyone would be save your money, don't waste your time and don't watch this dreadful movie as you will surely feel cheated.
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1/10
Mini's First Time ... and hopefully her LAST!!!
TinTin-615 July 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Almost every movie I have seen so far in 2006 has been excellent. There was the brilliant Thank You For Smoking, the hilarious Devil Wears Prada and the pretty exciting Mission Impossible III, just to name a few. And then there's Mini's First Time. I hadn't heard anything about this movie until I saw the poster for it in the movie theatre. It intrigued me, so I bought the ticket. What a waste of money and time! This was the most predictable movie out there. This movie was trying too hard to be 'edgy'. It wanted to be Lolita, Swimming Pool and The Opposite of Sex all at once, but it failed to be even a little close to any of these three movies. I felt cheated. I could have watched any Lifetime Original movie on TV and get the same messy, boring and cheap result. One positive note about the film however is Carrie-Anne Moss. Now that was acting! She was funny and not a single second was I thinking "Hey, that's Carrie-Anne Moss!". Same thing for Jeff Goldblum. Yes, those two made the movie, too bad one gets killed off early into the film, while the other one ends up in a coma. As for the end, no twist here. It was horribly predictable. Skip this one and rent Swimming Pool instead (listening to its soundtrack while writing this! :))
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1/10
Worst movie I've seen in years
jdadson26 March 2007
Warning: Spoilers
About 25 minutes into this film, it struck me. This is a sicko fantasy flick for teenage girls. Drink alcohol. Become a ho. Screw your step father. Kill your mother. Do it all to a musical accompaniment. (Turn up the bass.) Do it with a sneer that's supposed to be sexy. I had to watch the whole wretched thing to confirm that it was going to end with the obvious "plot twist." It did.

There's nothing to redeem this film. The characters are stereotypes. The acting is atrocious. The girl is not pretty. And sorry fellows, she doesn't get naked.

If you want to see a great film about an illicit affair turned murderous, see Body Heat. The author of this movie did.
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7/10
Unpredictable is getting predictable
xhris5 August 2006
Although I liked the movie and it's plot. The relationship between father Martin and stepdaughter Mini, on which a great deal of the movie builds, somewhat reminded me of the tension between Kathryn and Sebastian in Cruel Intentions.

Plot twists like in Mini's First Time, Wild Things, Dead Mans Curve.. need I go on were refreshing a few years back. Nowadays the unpredictable twist are getting rather predictable to the regular movie viewer.

And let's be fair maybe looks like Mini's can get you out of trouble in the movies but the writers should have drawn the line somewhere and instead of looks let the whole plot support on more realistic excuses for her to come up with.
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7/10
Splendidly Wicked
kyyle731126 October 2006
This was fun to watch, see where it takes me, I don't have to get too involved movie. The beauty of this movie was the fact that you never really care what happens to any of the characters so you are detached from the outcome of anyone's actions. All of the character's in this movie, save for the persistent detective played by Luke Wilson, are deviants to a society that created them. With a few twists and turns the plot flows smoothly from start to finish with little left to the imagination. It seemed a little predictable, but nevertheless fun to watch the plot unravel. The acting was precise and enjoyable and any movie that kills off a Carrie-Ann Moss character is a good one.
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5/10
Black Humor Strikes Again.
IRateFilms24 September 2006
Mini's First Time is not the first time this film has been made and released with a target audience in mind. Mini's First Time, starring Alec Baldwin, Nikki Reed, Jeff Goldblum and Carrie-Ann Moss rehashes the same old dark humor American Beauty made mainstream. Equipped with almost an identical soundtrack as American Beauty, Mini tries too hard to be cool. Other than the excellent performances by both Baldwin and Moss, the film is bereft of any originality and seems to take itself to seriously for its own good. Nikki Reed, although young and annoying at first becomes more and more bearable as the film progresses, and towards the end is actually acceptable. Playing the young femme fatale, Reed lends her sexuality and small amount of talent to the screen, whilst simultaneously captivating my attention with her eyes. Goldblum plays the same character he's been playing the last few years, straight out of Igby Goes Down, complete with the riches and lust for infidelity. This film does portray the rich of the Hollywood hills very well, so well that after 10 minutes or so you feel like part of the group (morning drinking, promiscuity, and infidelity). These attributes have become so mainstream in todays wealthy, dark humor, family films that it does not seem to affect me anymore like it did the first time I sat down to watch Less Than Zero or American Beauty. The film does have an edgy direction, and sometimes interesting cinematography. Unfortunately the amateur narration, by Reed, takes away from some of the realism and leaves the film feeling dull at times. Of course, not all of the film is backwash, and the director Nick Guthe does show promise in his search for something original. Unfortunately Guthe did take the risk of being cliché, and with all intents and purposes hit the nail right on the target.
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2/10
Vacuous and tedious
NotorietyH12 December 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Mini is a precocious high-school student who (rather ridiculously) decides to become an escort and (even more ridiculously) happens to get her step-father as her second ever client. The two start a relationship and try to get Mini's mother committed so the two of them can be together. Through a series of convoluted plot mechanisms, involving murder, blackmail and all too obvious twists, the audience is taken on a tedious journey through a movie that isn't half as clever as it thinks it is.

The main problem with Mini's First Time is that almost every character is completely reprehensible. A fact that the writer/director tries to excuse by having Mini's last line of the movie be "Don't be worried that you had no one to identify with but me," (or something like that). No I wasn't worried, I was just annoyed that I had spent an hour and a half of my life watching a barely two-dimensional character destroy the lives of other wafer-thin characters.

Despicable, manipulative characters like Mini only work if they have enough depth to sustain an audience's interest. If we're not going to like a character, we at least have to know or at least have hint of their reasoning and justification for their actions. Movies like Pretty Persuasion, Heathers, Election and countless other movies work because we can see some of the reasoning and motive. Mini is just a vacant, underwritten and stereotypical 'Black Widow' character. The writer/director tries to add depth to Mini with a pointless, lazy and completely perfunctory voice-over, that tries to mask the fact that Mini has about as much depth as a puddle. Would it have been too much to ask that some of the boring, obvious voice-over that 'told' us what was going on was replaced with, I don't know, maybe a few scenes, or visuals to hint at maybe a theme or at least a bit of character depth? Mini's First Time should be shown in screen writing seminars and film schools to show how not to use voice-over.

The plot was obvious and hopelessly contrived. But luckily I cared so little about what happened, the painfully obvious twists and unrealistic relationships and character actions didn't bother as much as they would have in any other movie. Anyone who couldn't see the 'photo twist' coming, really needs to sit down and have a look at themselves.

As I sat and watched the movie, all I could think of is "I really don't care what happens," and neither should you. Avoid. 2(adding one purely for Alec Baldwin)/10
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1/10
Trash
lucyn8910 June 2007
Warning: Spoilers
There are some movies that are bad, and there are other movies that are just so horrible that it makes me want to kill myself. This movie made it to my list along with Rosemary's Baby. First of all, could they have chosen an uglier girl? Well, fine, she wasn't hideous, and she looks decent in real-life pictures, but the girl for this part was supposed to be beautiful. She looked liked a trashy whore. Baaad make-up. And what was up with the valedictorian part? I couldn't hear how she got that. She said she was a straight-C student? What, did she kill every student with a higher GPA? And come on!! The beating in the prison! He attacked the guard, yeah, but it didn't seem like he was still fighting after he fell on the ground. What lesson is this supposed to teach us? What was the purpose of this movie? Well, I should have known. Any movie not shown in movie theaters is bound to be disappointing. What a waste of my time. I'm now 2 hours older, a bit dumber, and a lot angrier.
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1/10
Garbage movie
miltruiz50627 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Worst movie I have seen in a long time. The writing is absolute crap. Black comedy? It didn't make me laugh once. Last time I saw a disaster like this it was Very Bad Things, and this is worse. Absolute waste of time. Suspension of disbelief suspended. How the hell do you manage to cast Alec Baldwin, Luke Wilson, and Jeff Goldblum, all of who are excellent comedic actors, and end up with such a turd of a movie? Because maybe the money you spent on the cameos you should have spent on a better script. I am not amused. I would love to beat the director until it was in a wheelchair for life. What an idiot. Considering how difficult it is to fund and film a movie. It is absolutely beyond me how turds like this one even get made. This piece of crap actually made me angry at how crappy it is. This is not even crap, this is like the crap crap craps after it's eaten other crap.
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10/10
Skank Central
cat_on_imdb10 November 2009
When I watched this film I got stricken with a horrible feeling. I was trying to figure it out what it was then it dawned on me; it was not the movie but rather the fact that, despite being just a movie, one is reminded about how it really is in America. The women here are just as portrayed in this flick. Though they may not act out what they really want to do, don't fool yourself. They think just as these characters and this is what's disturbing most. The men, equally likewise; they are desperate women firster douchebags who will do anything for a whiff of snatch, including being duped by the scams females play. There really is no innocence in this country today.
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2/10
A film of no substance or value
staceycaligirl2 May 2006
I just saw this film at Tribeca and all I have to say is this was the worst use of my time. Probably one of the most mundane, and worthless pieces. In the first 15 minutes, I truly thought I had sat down to a good film. Unfortunately, I had a hard time sitting and waiting through the remainder of the film. This film is going to bomb in box offices if it gets picked up..I wouldn't pay to see it. Odd choice in casting. This is one of those films that you see and within 10 minutes are already predicting the ending and guess what...what a surprise. Your predictions will likely be right. In an effort to be dark, they missed the boat and settled for a mediocre portrayal of something trying too hard to be interesting and dark. It was really quite laughable.
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