Shawn Hunter: A twelve? How do you get a twelve?
Mr. George Feeny: I don't know. You ever open a book?
Shawn Hunter: What?
Mr. George Feeny: A book! Do you ever open a book?
Shawn Hunter: What?
Cory: Don't ask me, I got a sixteen.
Mr. George Feeny: Gentlemen, do you ever go home and open a book?
Shawn Hunter: What?
Mr. George Feeny: I want you to go home this afternoon and open a book! I don't care what you had otherwise planned, I order you, nay, I command you. Go home and open a book.
Jonathan Turner: George.
Mr. George Feeny: What?
Jonathan Turner: Watch this. Hi boys. Nice boys. Nice boys. Now listen did you hear anything Mr. Feeney just said?
Shawn Hunter: No.
Cory: [Whispering to Jonathan] He's real mad.
Jonathan Turner: Do you have any idea why?
Shawn Hunter: No. He just started yelling like a crazy man.
Mr. George Feeny: [to a student in his office] After reviewing the disciplinary report from your last school I was expecting a much brasher young man. But I must say you've been quiet, polite. Now, if this is an attempt to lull me into a false sense of security I warn you Griffin Hawkins. Nobody pulls the wool over the eyes of George Feeny.
Miss Gill: Mr. Feeny, Griffin Hawkins is here.
Cory: You know what I can't figure out, Shawn? How do these other kids get their work in on time and get such good grades?
Shawn Hunter: Well, I got a theory, Cor. See, it runs in the family. Our ancestors were all slackers and goof-offs and now we're paying the price.
Cory: That's a good theory.
Cory: I wish there was some way to do a book report without reading the book.
Shawn Hunter: They can put a man on the moon, but you still gotta read.
Cory: I got it! We rent the movie and copy the junk on the back of the box.
Shawn Hunter: You're a genius!
Cory: What, you think that 16 was an accident?
Amy Matthews: How's your homework coming, honey?
Morgan Matthews: Great. I'm acing it.
Alan Matthews: Making sandwiches is homework?
Amy Matthews: Making their own lunches teaches them to be self-reliant and grown-up.
Morgan Matthews: I'm making Wonder Bread, Cheeze Whiz and Lucky Charms.
Alan Matthews: Ugh. Honey, let me give you a couple of pointers here...
Amy Matthews: She needs to make her own mistakes.
Alan Matthews: She's well on her way. I mean, look at this, this is disgusting. Nobody's gonna want to eat this.
[he takes a bite of the sandwich]
Alan Matthews: Hey, that's not bad. What the heck have you discovered here?
[Eric comes in]
Eric Matthews: What you eating, Dad?
Alan Matthews: Lucky Charms and Cheeze Whiz. You want some?
Eric Matthews: It's Morgan's, right?
Alan Matthews: Uh-huh.
Eric Matthews: You tried Froot Loops on pita?
[Alan looks at Morgan expectedly]
Morgan Matthews: Tomorrow
Jonathan Turner: [Jonathan's doorbell is ringing. He moves toward the door] I'm coming, I'm coming!
Cory Matthews: [Through the door] Mr. Turner, we're here.
Jonathan Turner: Oh, great.
[He opens the door. Cory and Shawn are there with their book reports]
Cory Matthews: 4:58. We made it.
Shawn Hunter: Sprinted six blocks, ran up four flights of stairs.
Cory Matthews: But we made it.
Jonathan Turner: I admire your dedication. Especially since the deadline is 5:00 *tomorrow*.
Shawn Hunter: OK, we'll wait, then.
Jonathan Turner: Give me.
[He takes their papers and reads from one of them]
Jonathan Turner: "Of Mice And Men- a poignant tale of two unlikely friends, set against the backdrop of the Great Depression. Exceptional cast, powerfully acted."
Shawn Hunter: Two thumbs up.
Alan Matthews: They ran a promotion at the store, and guess what you won? Two passes to Sliding Rapids Mountain.
Eric Matthews: Excellent!
Alan Matthews: Yep, you and your brother should have a blast.
Eric Matthews: Ah, no, no, no, no See, when I look at this ticket, I see someone in a skimpy wet bikini.
Alan Matthews: Well, that's entirely up to Cory.