Crow T. Robot: Hello. Good day. Happy to see you. I, Crow T. Robot, have penned a little ditty in honor of the star of today's experiement, Kim Cattrall. It's call "Oh, Kim Cattrall" by Crow T. Robot, sung by Crow T. Robot. It's marked allegro con brio, Köchel listing 643.
Crow T. Robot: Kim Cattrall, Kim Cattrall, Kim Kim Kim Kim Kim Cattrall. You were in "Mannequin", and that was a really good movie Kim Cattrall, Kim Cattrall, Kim Cattrall, Kim Caaaattraaaaa-halll! Kim Cattrall, Kim Cattrall, Kim Cattrall, Kim Cattrall, Kim Cattrall, Kim Cattrall, Kim Kim Kim Cattrall. You've never made a bad film. Oh, What the hell, ring my bell. Let's go to The Dells. Our relationship will gel. I like your smell, you're really swell.
[as Charlton Heston]
Crow T. Robot: I'm Charlton Heston for Con-Tel. I love you, Kiiiiiiiim...
Crow T. Robot: I liked your dress at the Ace awards- Caaaattraaaaaaaall
TV's Frank: Stuffing instead of potatoes? Honey, I love you!
Dr. Clayton Forrester: Meat is murder, Frank.
TV's Frank: It's none other than British pop star, Morrissey!... He's a little depressed.
TV's Frank: So Morrissey, uh, how ya' doin'?
Morrissey: He hurt me with that remark. Did I mention that I cried?
TV's Frank: Well, I mean, c'mon Morrissey. We're basically evil, granted, but a lot of what we say is just good-natured ribbing.
Morrissey: Well, it hurt me. Did I mention that I cried?
Dr. Clayton Forrester: Morrissey's going to honor us with a song, aren't you Morrissey?
Morrissey: This is a song that I wrote in a time in my life when I was very, very, very sad. Breakfast, actually. It's called "Hairdresser in a Coma": I cried last night, I died a million deaths. Thinking of your sweet face, and the way you sing. I cried inside, we lied and died. And then I cried again. I must have weep for hours...
[Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank lock him in a tupperware coffin]
Albert: The kids had banded together. Survived by scavenging and foraging in the streets.
Tom Servo: After the robot holocaust.
Tom Servo: [seeing "Writers" in the credits] Hey look! Apparently they're trying to pass this off as being WRITTEN.
Crow T. Robot: You're really stupid if you get by a car AFTER the apocalypse.
Joel Robinson: [sees copyright information on screen] Aw darn, it's copyrighted.
Lee: Hey, it'll be like the old days.
Tom Servo: Yeah, back when movies had plots.
Mick: Helen, I can sympathize with your feelings.
Tom Servo: But you're contractually obligated to finish this film.
Tom Servo: She just has those glasses so she can pull 'em off dramatically.
Joel Robinson: It's like he wants to order a pizza... but doesn't dare.